I don't know why anyone thinks she is a drunk driver. She looks like she has just been interrupted by the person in the backseat just before taking a sip of some refreshing Old Fashioned Sarsaparilla. Don't get between a thirsty woman and her Old Fashioned Sarsaparilla.

My dead grandfather has been working at home with Google! It's by-far the best job he's had. Last Wednesday we got a brand new BMW after finding money totaling $6474, all in quarters! He began this 8-months ago and immediately was bringing home at least $77 per hour. That's a lot of quarters! He sent us this link, go…

*enhance's

Correct use of apostrophes enhances the beauty of the world.

Burger joint is that style! So is Five Guys.

TEAM PIE FOREVER.

Guess what? The men who really love women and think they're the most amazing people in the world and treat them like goddesses ARE fucking misogynist pigs. The good men are the ones who treat women like actual people.

I'm a few years younger than her and I really don't think I'd want a 24 year old. It'd be like adopting a puppy or something. Heck, when I was twenty five I briefly dated a 21 year old and after a few months I was like "whoops, we're not on the same page here."

Mila Kunis's rant was so funny. It reminded me of the funniest text I ever got from my husband - 'I don't know why everyone is congratulating me on this pregnancy, I mean really I only spent a few minutes working on it.'

I miss that show so much

Another bar tending story:

That's not a "point" so much as it your rambling, bullshit sexist ideas.

Could she be half human-half egg? Could it be that we finally figured her out?

Fair enough, I don't know really know my art nouveaus from my art decos. Or my rococos from a really elaborate hole in the ground.

While I have come to the conclusion that I'll never have the opportunity to look at wedding dresses, if I did get married it would be in a giant, hideous, puffy sleeved 80s wedding dress.

Their next normcore vacation to the Wisconsin Dells

Do you work in Pawnee, Indiana?

French Montana is clearly a character in a Harlequin Romance. He lives in San Francisco in 1890.

I want him to be my slightly older boyfriend so badly. HES SO CUTE. And he can SING and he is FUNNY and seems really really NICE and is also wealthy. And I want to squish my hand in his hair. And I love his smile.

As for where I am now, I traveled a bit, visited a friend in Japan, ended up in Taiwan, decided I liked it quite a bit, and got some awful job teaching English for a year. Whatever, I used that year to find something better and got hired with a 'management consulting' firm in Taipei where I was sent out to do…