"...and this is the 'Contemplating your questions deeply so that I can provide an articulate answer'."

Unconscionable recoupling.

"Don't get so worked up, kid. I said I'd drive you to Disneyland, not that I'd buy tickets to it."

She is! She's my mum's age and living quietly in Sicily now: more girls should know about her.

Got carried away, sorry (it's one of my favourite stories: whenever I feel powerless, I think of 17-year-old Franca and how she made my country a better place by a simple act of disobedience).

Sounds like an outtake from Chuck Palahniuk's "Haunted".

Actually, if they're to marry in Italy wedding banns are required here. They have to be out two weeks before the marriage. There is no such thing as elopement* in my country, I'm telling you, unless, you go to some other place that allows quickie weddings (coughtheUSandmorespecificallyLasVegascough) and then have the…

I'll try any food once, on one condition: it has to be dead. (A friend of mine said he's tried fried grasshoppers and they were crunchy and delicious, so why not? I've already had frog legs, and they were amazing, and my dad routinely cooks snails. They're savoury and chewy and very nice.)

That, or your computer has been hacked into by Flaming Lips fans.

Sad, yeah. But her husband is a nasty piece of shit. She deserves better than somebody who is very likely a sociopath with very limited intelligence. I wonder if that kind of behaviour could be used against him in a custody lawsuit.

Outstanding.

Amen.

Battle Royale, people.

I'm always impressed by the resemblance between William and Prince Philip. It's really quite striking. He looked a lot more like his mum as a child, but he's basically morphed into his granddad over the years.

Trystane? What about Quentyn? Quentyn is Doran Martell's favourite and much of the plt has to do with the fact that although he is the cadet son and Arianne will inherit the title of Princess of Dorne, she feels threatened by him. Also, Quentyn is a bit of an arse, poor him, but he's hardly superfluous.

What's not to like? No one will ever message him ever.

You are not entitled to other people having ESP.

And you.

This is ridiculous, you know? You seem to be operating under the assumption that anything a woman does not explicitly state is NOT OK is then OK. When you know it is definitely not ok to creep up on somebody, and I wasn't going to insult your intelligence by stating the obvious.

Where did I say that I wouldn't be creeped out by somebody who came up behind me? Because I didn't.