When someone buys their fourth car, no one asks if that 30,000$ purchase was justified. It’s a hobby. Chill :) 

When “keeping it Real” goes wrong.

H/T to former Deadspin video editor Tim Burke for showing Simone’s routine in super slo-mo.

“Simone’s got enough gold medals at home. Someone get this girl a crown.”

Editor’s note: In case you’re wondering, The game has nothing to do with The Wire.

Nexo? ...Sounds like Bender’s other brother...

Iconic - “widely recognized and well-established”

I’ve learned more about grammar here in the Jalopnik comment section than I did from all 5 years of high school.

Five is right out!

Why Did Tyrrell Put Six Wheels On Their Formula One Car?

If they can co-opt the “ok,” sign. We can use Betty.

“Betty White”

This is fucking hilarious and thanks for explaining it, because I was still at the figuring-out stage of saying her name out loud and trying to come up with anagrams.

Your gun is digging into my hip..

Heard he became a detective with the Miami PD.

WHO THE HELL IS THAT

alrighty then 

+1 Laces Out

stay strong, Dolphins fans. You still have this guy to remember:

And Jordan just retold the story the week before the Super Bowl, thus making it relevant news again. But don’t let that stop you from trying to be snide on kinja.