Wanna know how I know that you don't play modern sports games?

Yeah.

I just want to say that Hot Mustard is the best McNugget dipping sauce of all time.

Geoff's stuff has been featured on Kotaku before.

Also, Geoff!

Seeing this guy back on Kotaku is always a welcome surprise. Hi, Brian!

$10 any pizza deal comes and goes. It's kind of like the McRib.

After the Rugby Transliteration, I never thought I would laugh again.

Have they petitioned Hideki Matsui for help?

This makes me want to take my shirt off.

I must assume as much.

This is hands down one of the best sports articles that I've ever read on the Internet. What a great angle.

I don't think that man is that guy's buddy at all.

Thanks, Emma. I can sleep tonight.

He never did want a "Large Farva."

It's funny and endearing because he knows about internet memes.

All local games are blacked out

I'd like to hear about it, pot heads.

There are excellent knock-offs out there. I have an authentic Nike and a knock-off Nike and aside from the laser engraved size tag on the bottom, they are virtually identical.

There are excellent knock-offs out there. I have an authentic Nike and a knock-off Nike and aside from the laser engraved size tag on the bottom, they are virtually identical.