The somewhat more legitimate journal they're taking a stab at parodying is shortened to PNAS, so it's not much better anyway.

Ah yes, why don't we make up for being called out as being a sex criminal by demonstrating exactly why this is a sex crime and not a scandal? The stupidity of these people - good that wiki-editors caught it quickly.

As usual, I defer to Zach Weiner and his excellence.

I knew it! It's gonna be just another Alien prequel.

Ridley Scott!? Is this another Alien prequel in disguise?

That is not out of the question either.

Once the media jumps on this, the freak out is inevitable. Then we'll have to endure people blaming Ebola on all sorts of things that make no sense.

Ron Swanson would mine the gold out from the ground with his bare hands.

Actually, yeah - this is just about the only thing that will make stations think twice about what they put on air.

Look, he's a considerate Captain. He's just taking care of van Gaal's selection problem with too many attacking options up front.

I think they've also done the use the safety raft as a parachute thing.

So are we looking at Moonbase Alpha 2 soon?

Yes, but they can choose to be civilized and not harass people.

ARGH NO I WANTED TO WONDER TOO STOP SPOILING ALL THE ANSWERS

I wonder if a lot of the popular female athletes are already signed by competitors (e.g. Nike, Adidas, etc.). I'm sure UA sponsors women's sports teams and has signed athletes too though so that's still a valid point.

Not just that - apparently you should never take a shower without clothes on or go to the bathroom ever either!

Strategic Dismemberment was useful in Dead Space as well, wasn't it?

and of course - gas/oil/car lobbying.

Oooh we should call dibs on Feminazilluminati! Got a nice ring to it.

Sorry, wait, what was the truly original story idea for Into Darkness again?