So I am listening to this for some reason while watching this gif over and over and it is kind of magic.

Your name is drfattybiscuits. Even by dog standards that has no dignity.

I haven't missed the point. The point about unwritten rules, the Book, etc., is right there on the surface—explicitly written out. My point is that baseball doesn't struggle to be fun. Watch literally any game and you're going to see guys having fun. How demonstrative they are about it will vary—and yeah, there are…

I believe you've missed the point. Baseball has an abundance of humorless prigs who think that the slightest whiff of exuberance, or, really, anything other than grim workman-like drudgery somehow goes against the "unwritten rules" and demands to be smacked down.

This train is expected back before Derrick Rose.

Thanks. As I said, I'm not really a soccer fan. Trying to start getting into it now that our local team (TFC) may no longer be the single worst soccer franchise that ever existed.

There's real debate over this in world football at the moment, because it's actually a triple punishment. You give up a goal (and if they miss, too bad, because the point of a penalty is to act as if the foul had not occurred. A clear opportunity to score is replaced by a clear opportunity to score), you lose a player…

Soccer teams score like 1-2 goals per game on average, right? So here they get almost an automatic goal (70-84% is pretty high, no?) and the other team has to play shorthanded for the ENTIRE GAME, which seems insane.

First off, penalties are not guaranteed goals, success rates vary between 70-84%. Second, even if it was an automatic goal, then there would be no punishment, the red card acts as a deterrent and punishment, which is its point. The objective of the punishment system is not to "undo" the infraction, it's to deter and…

I'm obviously not really a soccer fan, but shouldn't either the guy get sent off *or* it be a penalty kick? The team has to basically give up a guaranteed goal on a penalty kick and play a man short for the rest of the entire game?

REVERSE'D

BREAKING NEWS:
Authorities are on the scene of a raging dumpster fire. According to witnesses, it looks like DennyCrane's NCAA bracket.

We're being serious for a sec? The 30 for 30 shows are eminently watchable and they know how to manipulate your emotions.

I'd watch the shit out of this episode if they actually made it.

+1/2 of Mount Rushmore

Was it paid in pennies?

And Scolari cries....

Fortunately, he's surrounded by mattress makers.

It's bewildering to think that an actual conversation was had in which all of this was set up, and everyone involved was somehow convinced that the final product was a cool thing that needed to be posted on Instagram. Just, like, negative levels of self-awareness going on here.

Never forget the triple head-shot

Figured leaving it there with the correction added was more honest than just completely re-writing. So, there you go.