I'm just going to leave this here without further comment: Backpfeifengesicht: German. "A face badly in need of a fist."

Sigh. This is why we can't have nice things.

The ten-foot pole is one-hundred percent pure pure canon. If you didn't have one in the Middle Ages, you were screwed.

Times change, and bronze bikinis will reflect way too much lens flare.

At least we can count on one gratuitous underwear scene.

My kids, ages 10 (M), 13 (F), 15 (M) are thoroughly wowed by the series. They complain when it ends. They absolutely love it and I can see it stoking an interest in science. That's a win as far as I'm concerned.

OH YEAHHH—- *whooosh of instantaneous critical depressurization, followed by an unnerving silence*

The inability to binge-watch this new season already is, um, DISAPPOINTING!

Go home, NBC, you're drunk.

The Hobbit 3: Die Harder With a Hard Vengeance

I'm Ian Thomas Healy, author of the superhero fiction series The Just Cause Universe superhero, as well as other speculative works. I love io9-it is my favorite news source for all things SFF! Also, please buy my books to support my writing habit! More info at www.ianthealy.com.

Boy, I'll bet that Polish fire tower house is hell when you've had a few too many Tyskies at the local tawerny.

Well, I have a new book out today. Jackrabbit is the fifth book in the Just Cause Universe of superhero fiction.

*Frank Caliendo as SUPER FRIENDS guy voice* MEANWHILE, on the CW . . .

Dean Pelton's Joe name? OUTFIT, obviously.

Relevant to the top picture, I'm just going to leave this link here for everyone to read and marvel (Totally safe for work, I promise):

Excellent.

I couldn't escape from the smartdogs.

I read comic books regularly, and I promise you that they're every bit as soap opera-y as, well, soap operas.