I’m a CPA. LOL.

In fairness, what were the odds his helmet would hit anyone throwing it into the stands at an AFL game?

has earned the Arena Football equivalent of being waived

Pugs don’t understand the term “babysitter” and are too proud to ask for clarification.

Vote: plug.dj

Would you be similarly outraged if a female Cavs fan berated and then struck a male Bulls fan over the head with a frying pan?

Scouting reports list Steward Butler as serviceable.

How about we worry about actual domestic violence... as opposed to videos that don’t depict domestic violence but which you could twist in order to get offended? That sound good?

No, she called herself a monster for having been raised as a killer. She never said “I can’t have kids so I’m a monster.” Whether or not yourself or others read into it that way is your own prerogative.

She can’t just be the coolest aunt, or have made the valid choice that, as an assassin and spy, maybe kids are not in the cards for her. Or even the more radical choice that she just doesn’t want them. No, she can’t ever have babies, so her life is ruined. She is an incomplete woman.

Dispatch: “We got a report of a fucked-up white guy who insists he’s a net.”
Cops: [arrest Andrei Kirilenko]

You always need more Flair.

Floyd got confused. He forgot you hug women and punch boxers, not the other way around.

Once again, Kate McKinnon is the only one not phoning it in.

I want bars to lose money if they order this fight. I want them to stop ordering Mayweather’s fights. I hope this fight sucks, and if I could bet on that, I would. Spoiler alert: Mayweather will dance and win a decision. You can all save your money.

Reggie is undoubtedly ridiculous. But, I do have to admit that he had some solid analysis during the game tonight. More of that, and less of everything else, and I think we’re golden.

No, there just wasn’t a way for them to take advantage of a paid system before. If you want to put it on websites that will actually give your mod exposure, you couldn’t charge and had to ask for donations instead. But that’s no way to make money - you won’t make shit.

“Woman Uncovers Two-Way Mirror in Bathroom” sounds like one thing, but this is pretty clearly another. There are a lot of crazy/weird/stupid people in this world, and the owner of this business is just another one of them. You’ve made the pieve about how out-of-touch some small business owner is, because you find it…

Looks like that chick has hot tits, so we’re getting close.

At this point, you’ve got to think they have a shot against the Hawks in the next round, right?