Be a Padres fan. We probably won’t suck that bad and we’ll give you all the fish tacos and Stone Brewery beer you want.

Too close to Steeler fans. Ew.

It’s no Sauce Castillo.

Both of them were right. It wasn't bad for a player who shouldn't have been anywhere near the squad.

As of press time, Gawker Media is still coping with its inability to identify the fraternity's role in his death.

There are worse crimes against humanity.

They used to be part of the Asian Football Confederation, but in 1974 after the rest of the Arab world refused to play them, they were voted out. Because antisemitism.

Not at all, that was pretty sweet work as well. Worth at least a prominent dukedom in Kane's coming kingdom, I'd reckon.

COME ON YOU MOTHERFUCKING SPURS

I'LL SHOW YOU YOU STUPID FUCKING GOLF HOLE

I went to a Heart show last year, and it seemed like they played just as many Led Zeppelin songs as they did songs of their own.

Director: Okay Tim, you might not be so recognizable to our audience, so why don't you start off by letting the viewers know who you are.

Believe it or not, Mozgov was actually this restaurant's third choice for this commercial. The director wanted either LeBron or Kevin Love instead, but instead of knocking the food off the table they kept insisting on sweeping it under the rug.

"God, she's beautiful...I mean, 'Her phenotype is pulchritudinous.'"

Don't worry Nigel, you're not the first one to make that mistake. That's pretty much Mark Sanchez's go-to pick-up line at a Sweet 16.

Way less embarrassing than what Pitino had to say about her.

In fairness, watching a player light up the US back line is like watching highlights of a pitcher striking out Mark Bellhorn.

Well I was thoroughly bashed yesterday for daring to suggest that getting fresh beer right from Stone is better than bottled Pliny, I'm glad to see my opinion validated.

It's a much better deal, per-ounce, in the 6-pack, too. People aren't used to seeing 6 beers for $15—usually brewers go w/ bombers or 4-packs when they're dealing with the expensive stuff, so I wonder if the sticker will be shocking to some people at first, but I think it's fair. I'm not sure I'd go through 6 in time…

I just picked up one of these six packs the other day. The Enjoy By never disappoints...