This is very alarming to me because it looks like blood is being poured into the candy bar. I was always kind of afraid that this is what happened to poor, fat Augustus Gloop because, let's face it, Willy Wonka was a raging asshole.

Personally, I keep hoping they use Gnarls Barkley's "Gone Daddy Gone" because the lyrics are actually pretty perfect for this story.

Also, someone needs to tell men that the "x stitch" on the suit coat's vent(s) is supposed to be snipped off before you wear it! I have seen so many young guys wearing their first suit not picked out by mommy and they'll have a white s-stitch sewn on a black suit coat!

OMG! Your comment made me realize that this is the same way I feel when I watch my sister talk to our dad! My dad was supporting her and my niece for a while when she lived in LA and she would constantly manipulate him into feeling bad for her because her baby daddy is a mooching loser. I just realized that she used…

There are literally hundreds of amazing American beers awaiting your drinking pleasure. Seriously…TONS of beers.

I am currently a (female) law student and have worked in the legal field in the past. You may think this email was condescending and unnecessary, but I swear to God, a girl in my class once wore this kind of dress + a suit jacket + 6 inch heels + pearls (because pearls make anything klassy). She was a very…

Maybe this is a dumb question, but how can lesbians have safe sex? I generally associate that phrase with condoms, but there's no need for condoms in a lesbian sexual encounter… Does "safe lesbian sex" just mean no oral sex?

I seriously <3 saying the word "cunt!" I can't for the life of me figure out why everyone finds it so offensive—it's so satisfying to say! Kind of like "fuck," it has such a great mix if hard syllables that really give it some verbal oomf, ya know? Also, if we're going to be committed to all this female body…

I for one prefer Slurm over Surge.

"…not this month." Thank you. I freaking hate shaving my legs and it always seems like such a chore! In the winter it's really easy to ignore my hairy legs, but in summer it calls for a very strong ability to ignore things lol.

Aww, I liked it! It's like a cheeky nod to saloon girl fringe in the most fun, whimsical way possible.

She looks so fab!

This Elie Saab is glorious! I don't know why his Fall 2013 collection hasn't gotten more play from celebs because it's like a glorious jewel tone princess dream.

Blech, this hair! The poofy height on top is so 80's mom hair! There are some cool, pretty things you can do with short hair…this is not one of those things.

YES. Even plain ol' missionary sex is kind of awkward for me and my bf because he's so much taller—I can't imagine trying to 69. He'll try to lean down to kiss me during sex and he can't quite reach my mouth unless he makes some super weird torso contortions. I'm usually just like…kiss me later! Sadly, making out and…

From what I remember of my Media Law class, media outlets can legally publish almost anything, especially if it happens in public like this did. Their limits are mostly just an ethical question of their own good or bad taste…as you an imagine, that's often a fairly low standard.

Just FYI, that may not have been used to indicate Nazis—it could be referring to the original Hindu symbol.

Love this! I can't tell what the print is but the shape is gorgeous!

I love this silhouette! Maybe with a bit more boob coverage, though.

This is fabulous! I love that pattern on the rich red.