Taylor Swift at Burning Man:

It seems no matter what vehicle she attempts to use she’s doomed to be pedestrian.

And he sent them on Beyday!

omg

Judge Brown, shade right? White and square to the third power.

Yeah, the one thing I do like about this is that she’s saying, essentially, “Look, this is my take, but I never claimed it was an informed opinion and it’s kinda on you if you expected it to be.”

roommate: what are you watching?

I know she is an iconic figure, but seriously, she’s right - since when did she become an authority on rape? I don’t know why we expect our entertainers to be paragons of virtue and sages when they’re famous for being entertainers. Let’s worry when actual “authorities on rape” spout nonsense, not when aging rock stars…

I just spontaneously and aggressively ovulated.

God was all, sluuuuuurp.

“When Michelle and I came into office....”

She lost her license because she refused the breath test and her awesome parents took her car away.Her parents are the heroes here.

She’s not my hero. She drove drunk and is choosing to make light of her punishment instead of accepting the consequences.

• Never Made It As a Wise Man, Couldn’t Cut It As a Husband Either
  
  Totally cracked me up. Finniest thing I’ve read this week.

I'm both laughing and crying.

I just...

That also serves as an adept description of what is wrong with both Tyga's and Jared Fogle's romantic/sexual predilictions.

Okay, so, once I got done throwing up in a corner, I have some concerns. Does everyone just stop caring that she’s underage because she’s famous? Are we ready to admit the Kardashian family is pretty sick? Their mother seems to take joy in the fact their claim to fame is sex tapes and duck face.

This song probably leads off every single one of Jared Fogle's Spotify playlists...