It was even funnier when Jimmy had Jordanny Valdespin do this and he called that kid a cocksucker after he criticized his plate discipline.

So.....he's Edward Snowden?

Oh, I can leak the endings as well. Heart attack. Bankruptcy. Heart attack. OD. Early onset Dementia. Suicide. Heart Attack. Possession of a controlled substance. Tax Evasion. Murder/Suicide. Organ failure, etc.

Back in seventh grade, I had a kid try to bet me a dollar that the Yankees would beat the Indians...and he shouted at the TV when Jake beat out the bunt.

I learned two valuable lessons, courtesy of my mom:
1) It's not nice to take advantage of the mentally handicapped, and
2) "Just because I let you watch a rated R movie…

Via the Big Lead, here are two angles of former MLB pitcher Bobby Keppel's no-look, behind-the-back catch yesterday over in Japan. Routine grab.

Wait. Stop for a second. You can BET on this shit? As in gambling, which is based on randomness, uncertainty and probabilities. This is like betting on the outcomes of movies, or the daily plot of soap operas.

BAH GAWD KING. SOMEONE STOP HIM. HE HAS A FAMILY!

This guy is the Edward Snowden of things that don't matter.

It's Virgil, isn't it? Please be Virgil.

Man, this is really going to fuck up some wrestling fantasy leagues. Specifically, the WWE

I knew PEDs were rampant in professional wrestling, but this is a horrid side effect.

Wrestler: [enters to loud rock music]

While this guy may be able to bask in the anonymity of the Internet, it's no mystery who predicted that all the matches would run short: it was the under taker.

"I don't have a gambling problem" - Everyone who has ever bet on the WWE

(shuffles plans)

SI writers who break massive stories about baseball's (arguably) best player testing positive for steroids make $400,000 a year, yes.

Between Roberts and Bill Conlin, Deadspin has done a fabulous job covering happy endings for former sports writers.

It might not change your life if you're already making almost half a mil a year. It would sure as fuck change my life, though.

This is a great story, and I'm very happy for Selena Roberts. Not the least of which is due to her never having to write for a living again.

To me, Roberts' decision displays a severe lack of creativity, initiative, and personal integrity.