Do you mean you hope they aren't true, the rumors? Because she is poised, and talented, and seems lovely.

Exactly. Rock band singers don't smoke, they do cocaine instead.

Jared is one of the most healthiest people I know.

How to have hair as pretty as Jared Leto's:

ARE YOU KIDDING??? His hair is gross and stringy. Blech.

I'll do ya one better:

Total bullshit. So he's claiming that hair is 100% natural? No highlighting the ends or toner at the base? And he doesn't even cut his hair? Then why does he need a hairdresser?

I do not believe for a second he doesn't smoke or drink.

Is his hair pretty? I think it looks ratty.

Vegan with no alcohol?

Tragically, thanks to blocking Caller ID, they are not. I still get prank calls from idiot tweens at work and always think "The hell? Is your velocipede broken? Did you lose your hoop and stick? You have the internet now!"

That's the one thing that makes me a little ashamed about cell phones. I remember memorizing my friends/parents phone numbers as a kid. But about a year ago I had to go to the emergency room and my cell phone went dead and I realized I couldn't remember my live-in boyfriend of five year's phone number. I wrote it down…

And people don't believe in evolution

Hey all you fancy-schmancy kids— you may have all of these phones that can do everything bar cook your dinner, but you will NEVER EVER know the satisfaction of slamming the phone down on someone you hate. Pushing "end call" doesn't remotely have the same triumphant feeling.

Is anyone gonna tell these kids about how the phone is also attached to the wall and that you can only walk as far away as the cord allows?

Way back in 1997, In & Out had a hilarious scene where Shalom Harlow, dumped in an Indiana motel room by Matt Dillon, picks up the phone to call for help. Seeing the rotary dial, she begins hysterically pressing the holes in a futile attempt to dial out.

People probably did sooo much less drunk dialing with rotary phones. Not that they didn't try, but they just couldn't have been that successful. Rotary phones are hard enough stone cold sober.

What is with the sparklies on the boobies???? Why must the plus-sized continuously be ***BEDAZZLED***? It's freaking bizarre.

oddly cut shit with fucking owls on it.