"Alright, I figured out the time! Now just add 2 hours accounting for the time it took me to read it and you'll be all set!"

Dumb.

Can it swim?

"A huge advantage over the enemy"?

Someone invented something even better; they call it the airplane.

@bill cant fart: He had longer legs originally, but those high pressures underwater had some unexpected side-effects...

In #5 the kid isn't even awake and it appears his arms are being held up by an adult.

@djlaser: Hey, Ellen! Check this out!

Every time you pulled your chair back or tried to move the cursor to the edge of the screen the mouse would be on the floor or in your lap...

bounce the laser off of a mirror on the end back to another mirror on the base to create a light saber. Bshew. Bshew.

This is cute at first glance, but I seriously doubt both of those animals are native to that same area...

The terminology that you used is rather confusing. At first, by "marrying my friends" I thought that you meant that him and a few other friends were organizing some kind of group marriage....

Good grief, that must smell terrible. I hope they had nose-clips or something...

This was a bad move on Jeopardy's part. Alex will probably leave the show and go into the music industry now. He'll be a hit.

This thing could have won so many shooting challenges

I never understood these unboxing videos... What exactly is the benefit of watching them?

Awesome, finally a dock for a guy with incredibly small amounts of desk space!

She walked "STOMP! STOMP! sT-SToSTOMP STOMP!" into the room to find a coin on the table "CLATTER CLATTER CLCKA CLATTER CLATTER" This coin was shiny "DINGLE TWINK DW DINGLE TWINKL TWI TWINKLE"

@Chon: A lot more then a couple million.

What about stereo systems?