“I’d do anything... *anything*... to pass this course.”

Uhhhhh yeah, Women, [nervously looks around to see if anyone is noticing me binging Murder, She Wrote] yyyyeaahh, women.

“18- to 49-year-old women”

Oh no no no no no no no. This is the channel I can’t stand. My mom, too, gets glued to it. I can’t. I just can’t. It’s unrealistically sappy and saccharine and I feel like I need to watch a 10-hour reel of explosions and car chases as a unicorn chaser every time it’s on.

Yet they cannot be bothered to hire POC to lead any of their movies or shows. I watch Hallmark movies occassionally and they’re cute fluff for the most part but it continues to bother me how vanilla their casting is, be it movies or shows.

right. you can pry the big shiny black box that emits mind numbing coma inducing trashy shows from my cold dead hands.

This is what irked me about Alicia Keys “no makeup” movement. She has naturally beautiful hair and skin. What makes me fee confident may not work for her, but it works for me.

Napping is a fair alternative to pretty much anything.

Can’t go wrong with a literary joke. 

In fairness, she didn’t say she was anti-makeup just that it shouldn’t take more than 15 minutes.

You know what’s funny, when I was a teenager I was so opposed to makeup. I thought, “guys don’t have to elaborately paint their faces to leave the house, I won’t either.” This persisted through college and well into my 20's, although I’d put on some ridiculous overdone eyeliner and purple lipstick if I was going to…

I waste a lot of my time napping mostly because I just don’t know how to properly do my eyebrows.

I’ll have you know I waste time in myriad ways-putting crap on my face is just one of them, and it’s nowhere close to being the most frivolous.

ALL THE STARS FOR YOU.

I guess Zadie feels that white teeth should be sufficient.

“Lastly, you’ll be fine if the airline loses your luggage. You won’t have to show up to that big meeting in sweatpants.”