If I can get a DS3 and Eurotrash it up, its a sale. Bonus if I can do this color scheme:

I’ll take a DS3 please.

Is this annoying because some Americans say it, akin to “football” in lieu of “soccer”? Because I can kinda get that.

He featured against Latvia and didn’t cause any trouble. But three out of the last four. At least he’s versatile - they came in International, EPL and EPL U-21 action.

As a Liverpool fan I have to say that you are so full of shi........who am I kidding. That’s accurate.

He's played 15 games for BVB already. That's more regular than any other American trying to play for a top team in Europe.

“Guatemala submits the most shambolic imitation of set piece defending you will ever see”

When I was about 10 years old, I was rudely awakened by a loud car crash and subsequently alternating racing car engine.

I crawled out of bed, looked out my window and lo and behold, there was a car stuck about 6 feet in the air on top of what used to be a telephone pole in my neighbors front yard, across the street…

And how the goalie has already mastered the art of berating his defenders.

Potential buyer: I could do one of those things, but...

“Sorry, M’lord, we now realize that’s just Wayne Rooney. Please strike the beastiality pornography charge.”

Six years behind the deal is much more lenient than the original sentence: a five-year contract extension with Sunderland.

Such a shame Sunderland had to let him go. Big Sam does love guys who aren’t afraid to be direct.

Honestly, that swing is sweeter than some major leaguers’.

No ghost of Chris Kluwe next week?

Split pea soup looks like dog vomit and when you crumble crackers in it, it looks like the dog ate the vomit and vomited it again. But it’s delicious and I love it.

I was playing in a golf outing once and had to pee while we were all putting. I wandered out to a tree roughly 100 yards away, turned to face about three-quarters away from the green and let ‘er rip. Right as I started my stream, a gust of wind blew by and from the fringe, I hear my playing partner yell, “What the…