6 month old babies walking! Even though the inner ear isn’t fully developed at that age so they have no equilibrium! The power of dolphins...

Maybe sea births will help thin the gene pool?

This! My 24 year old super fit, super healthy sister had a text book perfect pregnancy, which she intended to have drug free in a hospital and she ended up having an emergency c-section because she just wouldn’t dialate enough. These hippies get so caught up in how natural the process is without seeming to remember…

I see what you’re saying, but who creates your idea of “perfect”? And why is there so little variation in what “perfect” is?

Female dogs tend to treat small children as pups anyway. I was warned when I adopted my girl that they can get a little nippy with kids who’re being rough as they see them as pups to correct and not like boy dogs who see them as fellow litter mates to play with. I can easily believe that one of the reasons this kid…

I don’t think it’s “not real English” so much as the US market requires SO MANY CHANGES to media to make foreign products platable to a local market. Just as an example the first Harry Potter book was sold as Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone in English speaking countries except the US where it was changed to…

But saying accents “get lost” assumes that American isn’t an accent. If you ask an Australian what accents people sing in, they’ll say American.

I prefer to think he opened his robe to expose, not a penis, but a mass of writhing tentacles all shrieking in an ungodly, otherworldly tongue.

You realise the female body produces a shit load of hormones and oxytocin when it goes into labour in order to physically enable her to give birth? Women don’t squeeze baby sized objects out of their bodies on a weekly basis for fun. Unless she’s a Duggar.

That is straight up ridiculous. You don’t think school teachers vent about their students or doctors and nurses don’t complain about patients? You’re telling me you’ve never once got annoyed by a family member and had a whinge? Jesus, how can you stand being so inhumanly perfect? Is everyone around you constantly…

Goddamn it, I literally just referenced this one. It is delicious in case you’re interested.

There was a popular one in Australia about 20 years ago called the Cocksucking Cowboy. It involved butterscotch schnapps. I think they just call them Cowboys now.

I’m 35 and their priorities never really change in my experience. They just get better at hiding them.

Which Tyga also does, by the way.

I would love any of those things more than a physical gift. Once you’re over a certain age, you have all the stuff you need and can generally afford to buy what little trinkets you like. But people are more busy, so spending time with family and friends becomes more precious. My family doesn’t do gifts at all any…

Hold onto your butt because the story of how he got the dog makes this entire story even more ovary popping:

Australian here and I mentally went “oh no she didn’t” when I read that. Yeah, it’s a pretty awful word here too. It wouldn’t have been so bad if she didn’t use it like A MILLION TIMES.

Oh fucking hell. I just started watching POI too. Goddamn it.

I’ve been single for almost two years now because of exactly this. The energy it takes to weed through the absolute shit ton of entitled, bratty man-children and straight up sociopaths is energy I could be spending on other things that are important to me. Honestly I’ve never been happier.

As an Australian I’m baffled that this is a big deal there. Minimum wage is $17 here with a 25 % loading if you’re casual to make up for the fact you don’t get the same annual leave/sick day benefits as permanent staff. We still have restaurants and cafes. We still have McDonald’s and KFC. Food in the US is no cheaper…