I wish I could make a spoonful of peanut butter last that long.

I'm almost wondering how he even ever had time to work. Was he just hanging out in his goddamn patchwork robe, raping people like constantly?

I could not be more blessed!

We've already heard her love-it-or-kinda-like-it cover of Adele's "Rolling In The Deep" (and seen it on Letterman), but now the full Aretha Franklin Sings The Great Diva Classics is available to stream on Amazon, ahead of its October 21 release. Hard to believe, but Aretha's iconic voice still sounds incredible as she…

I used to determine eligibility for SNAP (food stamps) and I used to cry weekly, at least, when I couldn't qualify some people. It was a shitty job....some days it was a good, helpful job, hut mostly it was pretty awful.

What does any of that have to do with taking someone's right to say no away though? Pretending to slip is not something adults just do. The only person I've ever known who had this happen to them was dating a very abusive 18 year old asshole.

I think food found while riding a train on the subway is more appetizing than anything from Subway...

I went to a Panera for the 1st and last time in Los Angeles. The salad I had was on par with McDonald's. Absolutely vile.

Nothing is worse than Subway. Nothing.

And they managed to not only choose white ladies. See, was it that hard?

The newest issue of Variety is their Power of Women issue and it has five different covers: Jane Fonda, Jennifer Lopez, Reese Witherspoon, Viola Davis and Universal Pictures head Donna Langley all get their moment in the sun. In their profiles, all of the women discuss their successes in Hollywood and the philanthropy…

..still more successful than me dating at 23.

This is a woman who went to China by herself and bought her shoes & boots in Italy & Spain and her clothes & skincare in Paris way before any of that was cool. I was well-trained by osmosis.

I've told lovely elders – and there are some hotties amongst them too, truly – that they are not going to meet anyone expecting them to show up at their door … and they ought to know that as "safety-conscious" as they are (which does make sense), they wouldn't let them in anyway.

beyonce should count herself lucky that she siphoned most of her genes from her mom and not her dad, who looks a lot like joseph jackson to me.