"If she isn't pregnant now, she will be very soon, like two minutes after the wedding is over!"

My favorite kind of missed connections are when I run into guys that were homophobic to me and I see them at the gay club.

My best quitting story is over a year ago when I finally built up the courage to quit my boyfriend of 2+ years. He was quite a piece of work and my self confidence was at an all time low and my anti-depressant dose an all time high.

I sold timeshares at a lake in Texas. I know, timeshare salesman is about five steps below used car salesman. So the job sucked and my boss sucked even more. He would yell at people for the smallest infraction and if you did something right, he would take all the credit.

Back in the late 90s, I was working at a small Christian newspaper and over the four years I stayed there my evangelical Christian boss, became more and more engrossed with demons that infested our workplace. Problems were never just problems, but troublesome demons determined to slow the good work he was doing. For…

I used to work for this ex Canadian hockey player for three years (who everyone thought was a hero but was actually a complete moron). Due to the fact that he worked as a goalie consultant for another hockey team in America, he was only at the restaurant a couple days out of each month, so he hired a guy to run it…

A year and a half ago, I joined a Japanese company that made things like non-sexual adult dolls and nazi war plane scale models (I, too, am still asking myself "what the fuck?"). I used a recruiter to find the job, telling him that I wanted to be a translator. The company said that they needed a bilingual person to…

I quit my abusive ex husband while he was on some sort of bullshit rock climbing/fucking-anything-with-a-vagina trip. I found a new apartment and moved all my shit out in the space of three days. Took the cat, the dog, and the big screen tv. Left the bed.

I worked at an insurance call center filled with the most self-righteous college drop outs/has beens and over-worked middle managers I've ever had the displeasure of working with. One day we get a manager that I swear was the devil himself (not the spawn of satan/spouse/servant, but the man himself). Anywho, he had a…

I'll actually be celebrating a one year anniversary of my big day of quit on the 13th of this month....it wasn't a job I quit though. I was in a very toxic and emotionally abusive marriage for 19 years, which fueled my hereditary alcoholism....making me pretty damn miserable to the point of going to sleep at night…

I made it almost four years as in-house counsel at an insurance company. My boss was crazy. She would repeat lies until they became her truth. She could go into my computer and edit my memos, so every day I took home a backup disk and filed it away in case she fired me for one of her manufactured mistakes. She came…

I quit a cult and half my family when I was 16. I grew up in the cult. Think Jehovah's Witness, but a bit weirder. I went to this fundamentalist church's private school where I got straight As but was mostly disliked by the other students for being a goody-two shoes. I studied the Bible all the time, was not allowed…

I am prodigiously good at quittin' shit. Been doing it since I was a lil bay bay. But a personal favorite was my childhood tennis lessons. We were broke, but I think my parents thought it'd be a classy interest to pursue (?). I was eleven and socially awkward and terrified of my cute instructor. Once it was…

I just want to preface this story with the fact that I've never quit a job like this, before or since, and I have had some jobs that I seriously hated, including the one that I recently left.

I worked for an absolute bitch for 5 years. Unethical. Mean. You name it. I had a 2 week vacation for July approved by her in January. To Europe. Three weeks before I leave she decides to tell me that she didn't think she could approve it. And that no manager should ever take more than 3 days in a row. This is…

I was working in medical supplies. I brought in about ten million dollars a month for my company and did the order processing, billing and sterilization of medical supplies. Also set up the builds with the product manager and handled inventory with 7 international warehouses, the smallest of which had over 2 million…

I worked at a fairly large cadillac dealership in the service department. The service department consisted of a very long building with service stalls on both sides and the dispatch office (where I worked) was right in the middle. I was one of the very few females employed in this department. It was a fun job but…

I don't have a great quitting story. yet.

Yeah, so many mic drops and burnt bridges. If you asked those people about me now, they'd probably just say, "who?"