Also, he wasn’t an asshole, he just made a joke. The proper response is to roll your eyes and say, “Me too”. 

I generally do not sympathize with people who see sexual things in ordinary objects, but I’m gay and that is still the most f**kable chicken breast I’ve ever seen.

If only Jared Kuchner’s dad had known about this, he could have saved so much money getting him in through the ‘side’ door instead of the back.

You’re not wrong, at all. However when I do I’m looking at a specific subset of movies: Movies that my friend with the car is going to try to drag me to. I don’t have choice in which movies we go to see, but I do have a choice whether to go or not.

I absolutely trust audience scores more than the paid reviewers. But I ignore both for MCU movies.

They’re idiots for not making that cuz I would easily watch a whole trilogy based on that single premise (and Fassbender’s performance).

Oh god yes the androids!! And the weather control machine! Wait, that was the Bionic Woman crossover episode...bring them both back!!

Loved the show as a kid, these were my favorite episodes.

Perpetual shadow of the Moon, for it to be a solar eclipse, which would be the really cool one to be able to see 24/7.

Well, top speed will eventually be more like 150mph, and it won’t just move Tesla branded automobiles. But fixing those two things doesn’t magically fix everything else that’s wrong with this idea, it’s still idiotic. 

Autocorrect screws me because I type away and don’t realize my text has been ‘fixed’ for me until it’s too late, and I end up looking like a guy who doesn’t know the difference between your and you’re or their and there.

Came here to say this, did not have an awesome GIF to go with it so I’m glad you beat me to it

I’m a conservative, more libertarian but sometimes republican, who will be voting straight democratic Nov 6th precisely because of crap like this. Straight democratic ticket, first time I ever voted straight ticket for any party in my long life. 

Don’t know anything about gymnastics, don’t care anything about gymnastics...but even I can tell that was freakin’ amazeballs. 

Pretty sweet, but you know that now we’re going to have to deal with Trump reassuring us that his dick is actually quite big, he’s satisfied all the women and he’s been with many of them supermodels, and so on. He’ll probably drop it at a press conference with a world leader, for max coverage.

Can confirm, was able to sleep anywhere, at any time, on any one, in any position, just by being run so ragged I could no longer keep my eyes open. 

Aziz Ansari should be allowed to come back immediately without question, he was only guilty of being clumsy.

It’s a pretty shitty Camaro, but also a really sharp wagon (shooting brake). 

Thank you for that, it was

Penn Jillete, of Penn & Teller. He said that Trump didn’t use the n-word around him but did say racially charged things and is a racist.