At my high school, we always got to watch the games during class. About two years ago, I started working with one of my old teachers. I asked him about it. He told me it was because half the teachers in the school were relying on the pool to make their next car payment.

An American that DIDN'T start a war? [faints]

Oh yeah, I don't mean guys who are just handy with cars, I mean the extreme meatheads who race on weekends, obsessively tune (or whatever it's called) their cars, won't shut up about it and are quite obviously overcompensating. The guys the commercials where dudes brag about their Hemi are targeted toward. I'm just…