i want to fill my nostrils with the scent of a beautiful womans crotch.

Perez Hilton should have gone as Fat Perez Hilton. That would almost be entertaining.

I started reading them at home (alone) last night and didn't have the ladyballs to make it past the first one! Just finished them here at work. In the daylight. Surrounded by coworkers.

Perhaps an ELEGANT DINNER PARTY?

I'm pretty sure he's using his middle finger to poke at her, which freaks me out / pisses me off even more.

"Sociopath", huh? Is that gaslighting I smell?

Amen! It's like people complaining that there's a lot of stupid comments on Twitter. Duh. Don't follow the people making stupid comments if you don't want to. Don't follow wedding/baby boards if you don't want to. It's the very specific, well-curated boards that get the most follows anyway.

*gigglesnort*

...not only are they visually repulsive to me, but also, a fat woman - that's a sign of low self-esteem, that they have no self-respect, that they're not a motivated person, that they lack self-discipline. So you can tell a lot about somebody by how well they take care of their body.

Sometimes I forget to glance at the author before I start reading a story, but I can always tell it's Lindy by the end of the first paragraphy. She is fantastic.

he's only firing on five or six braincells. You don't want his crooked half-sperm up in your uterus because you'll end up with a litter of inarticulate Neanderbabies that won't shut up about shoes.

I would be absolutely terrified for this man to perform oral sex on me. Those chompers are the stuff of nightmares.

Tip from a fat girl who loves walking around at festivals: Apply antiperspirant to your inner thighs. Sounds weird, but does WONDERS for chafing!

Malbec is also a mid-west hipster who collects vinyl, probably 5-7 years older than you. He wants to tell you all about being Buddhist, but never mentions Kerouac by name.

I am literally gritting my teeth in anger right now.