But... why don't they just have the same story but make them be married already? Then they can have all the sex they want and it will already be Godly. Except you know.... no butt stuff.

"She also refuses to vaccinate me. PLEASE HELP."

That Fifty Shades gif in the beginning:

here's my sex spreadsheet

NEW THREAD. So my friend has seen the preview video where Aviva is like THE ONLY FAKE THING ABOUT ME... IS.... *tosses prosthetic* THIS!!!!!

Um, did you just imply hippos are not graceful?

This is the Comcast cancel call equivalent in nightclub booking.

http://jezebel.com/how-not-to-tal…

You're just jealous that you don't work at buzzfeed and get paid to write three sentences any middle schooler could write and pair it with a gif parade.

heh babeh, you can, uhhh, ummm,

Since the purpose of the came is to cross boundaries and cause offense, your style of play seems to undermine the purpose of the game ... why not just buy apples to apples instead?

I just leave the blinds open. #krazy

As a native Delawarean: 1) So not surprised and 2) Whoa, in their defense, there is like NOTHING to do there.

"Hey Mary, what are you and Tom doing this weekend? No plans? Well, how about you guys come hang out and watch us while we bang in a hotel room for a few hours? Sure, we'll order some food. I hear there's a Chipotle nearby."

Is that hickory smoke I smell or the fires of passion? I hear the guacamole makes and excellent vegan lube. Dinner and a show for $6.75, now that's a deal.

But the quizzes that tell us which Harry Potter house we'd be in still hold up, right?

I think Beneful looks delicious because it looks like human food while also thinking Dinty Moore looks gross because it looks like dog food. There's no winning.

From the article:

I'm not apologizing for the cop. The cop is wrong. But why give the cop the opportunity to be wrong when you have the power to diffuse the situation by just listening to the cop? And she wasn't mentally ill, she was drunk. There's a difference.