Do not use the words "sex" and "clown" in the same sentence ever again.

Because pregnancy is GOD's punishment for a woman having allowed a penis, even her husbands, to enter her vagina. Therefore, she should cover the cost of all health care needs related to the precious bundle of cells she will burn in hell for aborting. Duh. /sarcasm

Posted without comment.

Yeah, that makes sense.

I thought it said Patrick Stewart, I'm so fucking disappointed. I'm going back to bed.

Good point, that number could very well be the number of times he's banged one or two women.

replying to promote

So, he's the perfect man then? *hops in time machine* Hasta Jezzies.

You burn the casserole and have to get take out when his boss Sauron is coming to dinner. You hope he doesn't see the take out containers, but he's a giant eyeball.

Right, but it's the "skinny all over except the belly" type that I find confusing.

And he'll be so grateful you gave him the time of day, he won't even care that you're always going over to Gondor to borrow sugar even though Ithilien is much closer.

She's not just eating that corndog, she's sucking it's soul out.

THIS TIMES A MILLION!

Suck it yourself, feline perv!!!

I was thinking the same thing.

Must be a fire drill at Sea World. He should be outside by now, if this was a real fire, he'd be dinner.

Congrats, you're the dipshit who didn't get the joke. Well done.

Kerli is pretty awesome.

Yes, everything must be taken at face value at all times OR ELSE!

That's just Miley being all free spirited or some shit. RULES ARE PUSSIES!