Because it looks like a gun?

I assume you can only drink that in shots?

"A handful of Nobel Prizes met an unusual end – fodder for the treasury of countries during World War I and II."

While it is ostentatious, Belvedere's Vodka packaging is much better than the Zack Morris Lemon Gin. The bottle looks like an early nineties brick cell phone.

How does one differentiate between "drugs" and "dangerous drugs"? Is there an underground extreme drug culture I'm not aware of, where one in ten doses of LSD is actually real hydroflouric acid, or every once in a while a joint will actually be a firecracker in rolling paper that explodes Yosemite Sam style?

I have approximately one million pictures like this from the last Flaming Lips show I went to. It was such a visual experience I wanted to share it with everyone I know so they would know how cool the act was.

Ohhhhh that makes a big difference.

When I read this title I thought to myself "I swear to god I typed Jalopnik in the browser, how did I end up on Deadspin?"

Everything I need to know about jumping a vehicle over a bridge (completed or not) I learned from watching Speed.

Is that WATER leaking out of your FACE?

Because if my iPhones battery dies it doesn't burst into flames?

"(which doesn't get you laid BTW)"

I wish I could heart you twice...

There's this thing called slash fiction. It's where fans will write erotic (usually homosexual) fiction about celebrities or fictional characters getting busy. Jeter and A-Rod making love, or Ron, Harry and Hermione finally giving in to the tidal pull of their hormones.

It sounds like you're describing a sex manual for engineers...

In a Japanese ghost terrarium.

Not even Avengers? I hate paying the exorbitant prices movie theatres chare just as much as the next guy, but I will pay anything they want to see that movie.

Oh Beck. Thank you for making my teenage years so weird. I forgive you for the Scientology.

For all the nay-sayers: Raisinets are delicious. I think that should be taken as fact. However, they are stealing-them-out-of-your-kids-Halloween-haul delicious, not $9-at-the-theatre delicious. For that kind of cheddar, one demands the snack satisfaction that only a Junior Mint or Peanut M&M can provide.

Pssh that's old school. Knee on 6, what could go wrong?