My daughters (12 and 9) think I'm scary. This is not totally positive. It's partly because I'm seriously ill and when I'm in a lot of pain I'm snappy. I'm working on it, because it doesn't matter how much you say sorry if you keep doing a mean thing. It's much better now than when I was most sick. But I am pretty…

Child rape laws are written to take into account age differences between offenders and victims. If the age of consent is 16 and a group of 15-year-old boys engage in sexual activity with a 4-year-old child, that act is called rape. Even though all parties are under the age of consent. Yes! Shocking, innit! And if a…

Sure, different parents will have different ideas about when it's a good idea for their children to be having sex. But if your teenager comes to you to tell you she's having sex it's because she trusts you. You can try your best to dissuade her and you can sure as hell make sure her new boyfriend isn't 24, but at a…

Did you decide to be born white, or black? In my pre-blastocyst stage, I went for white, because the benefits package looked better. LOL, no, seriously. But really, if you are a 1) non-over-weight, 2) relatively young and attractive, 3) white woman 4) with long hair that is not dyed super-crazy, and what you are…

And, since Janelle Monáe is black, she doesn't exist or something?

[First of all, put vanilla in the fruit part. I feel like I didn't see that. And make vanilla sugar, ideally, but whatever, sometimes you're busy.]

Ummm, you should try cognac, dude. Brandy is also delicious, sure, but cognac is hell of delicious. Didn't you listen to people rap about Remy Martin and soda pop when you were a kid? I am an old, so I listened to people rap about that when I was a teenager and 20-something until every rapper in the world switched to…

I don't know. My dad's almost 70, and he got hooked up with some killer mescaline a while back. Sure, he smokes sweet hydro all the time and that's just normal; he's been doing it every day since he was 19 (literally every day. Every. Day.). There can be too much of a good thing, but hey—it's his money, he's a great,…

"im just saying I would much wrather be a blk kid from a household of a 100k then be a white kid in a trailer park.." If that were what was on offer then it's possible a number of non-black people might decide to be black.

Yay, Chi's Sweet Home is the answer to every problem! (It's my younger daughter's favorite manga.) Please fix deeply entrenched, endemic racism, 'K Chi?

It's interesting that it's almost invariably items women buy that get put on these moral/amoral (?!) schemes of assessment. Purses? Well, ladies need them to carry around money and lipstick and like, grody tampons and other ladybusiness, I guess, so $35 would be OK, but $2500 is totally amoral. Amoral like a…

Do you know in that one Psalm where the writer pleads God, "purge me with hyssop/that I may become whiter than snow"? (I know it because I had a friend from a small town in Mississippi and it was his favorite psalm—he was gay and black so it was either an ironic favorite, or a sort of tortured one, or both.) This dude…

Are you a white dude?

The better question is how the child of two English professors could grow up without learning the comparative and superlative of the word "good," and their meanings and applications, given that this set of irregular adjective/comparative/superlative form are among the top 5 used in the English language. That someone…

She's the fucking pope! Don't fuck with her, or she will cut you! I think she can technically spend the whole year at a palace on Lake Como if she feels like it.

I live in SE Asia too! It happens to hundreds of millions of people. But I'm a nativeEnglish-speaking expat. I don't retract any of my trolling you for anti-feminist bullshit, but it's not kind to mock someone for not speaking their non-native language perfectly, so I apologize for that. I'm sorry.

I strongly prefer that men speak grammatically correct English and use properly-spelled words, but clearly that's made no impression either:

Celebrities like Marilyn Monroe really actually were thin then too, compared to an ordinary person. She had a 20 or 21-inch waist, IIRC, and that gets you a size 2 dress nowadays—probably a size 4 in the 90s. Now, she had waaay more T and plenty more A than many very thin Hollywood stars of today, but I think at her…

In my family our princesses have terrifying mystic powers and often use them to go back in time and prevent the development of sexism among humans during the agricultural revolution. That's how my daughters (12 and 9) like it.

Trolling: 2/10. Would not feed again.