I hope the rapture happens soon so they don't finish making this movie.

Ugh. That gives me a sugar-OD headache just thinking about it.

Seriously. I feel like my marriage is more meaningful if my friends aren't excluded from marrying, too.

I know. I feel a little sick thinking about the one time I visited when I was seven. I remember running down to the front aisle so I would get splashed when the killer whale did it's jump and eating an ice cream bar shaped like Shamu. Now I just feel gross thinking about what those animals were going through.

Oh my god, the noises the mother whales make when they're separated from their young. It sounds awful no matter what species you're talking about, but then when you learn that orca mothers and children usually stay together for their entire lives in the wild, it just makes it worse.

I completely understand where you're coming from. I haven't seen The Cove, because I don't think I could handle it. I knew Blackfish was going to be the story of the one killer whale, but one of the heartbreakingly awful things about it is that it makes a good case that he isn't a psychotic outlier, but a product of…

Yeah, I finally saw Blackfish this past weekend, and it was fucking disturbing. I don't know what I thought was going on at SeaWorld, but I didn't think it involved such ignorance about and indifference to intelligent marine mammals. And the lying to the public - not just about the circumstances of trainer deaths, but…

The important question is, which of these three will become the John Connor of cats? No one wants this:

The two I wait for all week are the Death Authors Podcast (H.G. Wells - played by Paul F. Tompkins - travels through time and interviews various dead authors. It involves a lot more drug references and profanity than you might think.) and the Judge John Hodgman Podcast.

More, please!

I have to think it's on purpose. I lost it at, "I'm sorry I pulled off your wig." Because everything is funnier with wigs.

The look on the doctor's face when they start fighting is priceless. "This is going to make the best dinner party story ever."

Also there are people who think hobbits actually live here.

No clue. I don't even think my own wedding had a color scheme beyond all of the bridesmaids wearing red (their choice). I do remember the awesome cake at my grandmother's wedding, though. Clearly, cake is the most important part of any wedding.

Oh, wow. That is. . . way worse than what I was imagining.

She really was trying. I DID like diet Dr. Pepper when I was in college.

I have been looking for the perfect excuse to use the Nopetopus. This is definitely it.

I have to admit to giving my co-worker a terrible gift one time. We were doing Secret Santa, and we weren't supposed to spend more than $10. Those dishwashing wands that store the dishwashing liquid in the handle had just been invented, and I thought they were the most genius idea ever. So I got her one, along with…

Pictures! Pictures!