Well put. #shortcommentsarepeopletoo

Side point: what the hell is up with the sleeves on that jacket? Are those for dusting the table/desk you're sitting at? Dusty? Just put your arms down and wipe. I...don't get it.

Another thing that works:

Agreed. I'd go with the straight teenage/preteen Biebs fans for the win. The nails. The hormones. The Bieber-lust. I already want to get under my desk for cover, and I'm not even in this fight.

I wish all workout video casts were broken down like this.

This ad reminds me of some of the posters of patients you find on the walls in the video game Bioshock (in the Medical Pavilion area).

This means, to apply my anecdotes:

This photo looks less like SATC and more like "The Wizard of Oz 2: Dorothy Gets a Cardigan."

But does it burn as much as the thought of conservative republican sex poetry?

This is going to turn into the Vogons from Hitchhiker's Guide REALLY quickly. Please make sure your detailed reports are all signed and filed in triplicate. Also, per Office Space, please make sure you use the CORRECT cover sheet for each report.

My cats would slap me in the face if I tried to put any of that stuff on them. They would be like, "ugh, please" and then go hide under the bed.

Preach. It's so much better to have a 'what if' - you just don't know. You might end up in a relationship and living with a guy who turns out to be a total alcoholic creep show that doesn't understand that 'no' means 'no', which is something you thought you avoided by spending every waking, non-working second together…

Jesus hears prayers, ESPECIALLY when you're on the toilet.

The Delia's catalog is not nearly as cool now. I used to get so excited when it came in the mail!

Ditto. I feel bad for the bride of the bachelorette party she crashed - I understand she's probably jaded, but keep that crap to yourself. No need to go rain on someone else's parade.

AMAZING.

I want that so bad. In fact, I want to make it into an actual flag and hang it outside of my apartment.

Things Karl Lagerfeld and my middle school guidance counselor have in common: Diet Coke addiction.

I have this issue. For the past few years, I've had a workout regimen that averages out to working out between 10 and 16 hours a week. For my BMI to be "normal" instead of "overweight" my body fat would have to be unhealthily low. Big middle finger to the BMI.

Doubtful, based on all of the palm trees. Hamburger Mary's is actually a chain. Also, with the fountain you're thinking of, these folks would not be getting in it. That fountain smells horrible.