Cruise control that’s mostly inoperable for 6 months of the year is a complete deal breaker, not a minor inconvenience. I will have to do more research on future car purchases to make sure that regular cruise will work without the radar. It sounds like I’ll have to avoid GM entirely (assuming all their cars use the…

I didn't know my dad had a Kinja account. 

Me not that kind of orc!

For facial recognition optimization, if it can calculate, “this person is probably female” then it can immediately ignore 50% of the possible people to search through. That’s probably how it got there initially and could most likely be turned off in the future.

I just realized that a cold, sagging Big Mac bares a striking resemblance to the President. The kind where you open the lid and they clearly didn’t put together with any care, and everything is all falling out one side.

My friend got a Gay Agenda for Christmas. It’s pink and sparkly and he loves it.

They hate making money? I really don’t know.

So I guess this story fills in every square on “What’s Wrong With America? BINGO”

So do you hate all women, or just your mother?

The phrase you’re looking for is “tragic masculinity.”

More likely he pays other people to bring him human meat.

This is pretty sad. My electric skateboard has 3hp, and the motor fits in my pocket.

COTD

He killed Hitler. We have to give him credit for that.

The HMS Buttery Males is a very different type of boat.

I was just reading the latest issue, but I think lost it. Have you seen my PNAS? Could you check if you’re sitting on my PNAS?

Yeah! And it’s spelled COLOUR too!

Ujiri is just too used to being in Canada, where the person you bump into apologizes first. This is just a cultural misunderstanding.

We’re forgetting Liarsday.

He just wants us to be excellent to each other.