It's terrifying isn't it?

The Miuramera

"If sweaters protect you from the cold, then sweater vests protect you from...Pretty Girls. Watch Out! There is a narrow cold front coming through Chicago tonight. Probably won't need sleeves though."

Fortress Azul-itude

Free Caravan Blue?

Fuck You CHIP!! ANARCHY, ANARCHY!

Whales Vagina?

"That sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons"

If you don't chew Big Red, then Fuck You.

7) Be really really ridiculously good looking.

Wait...What the fuck is that? What the fuck is that!? You are telling me if you live in a place where you don't have, or don't want a car you can pay per mile/minute to just ride in the back and watch Finding Nemo with little kids? Crazy. Does it come in windowless van format?

"I don't know how you spell quality, but thas a quality car right there"

I really hate socks. I would rather be wearing a pair of flip flops all of the time, and there are many people like me who feel the same way, so I think we should all stop wearing socks. I also want the government to subsidize flip flops for everyone born from Prince's "1999" album to, Oh I don't know, "Mmm Bop".

"It's because I stole the 'really grounded to the ground' system isn't it?"

Once, and it already happened. :D

Buy cheap strollers. Save money for things like this.

My son calls his the race car seat too. He is only two, and was really pissed when we got rid of the "race car" for a truck. Totally thrilled though when he found out his race car seat went in the "big truck".

I don't wants it. I needs it.

1) Call Police Authorities at 2:00 am

OHHH! You said don't tase me bro? Shit. Happens to me all of the time.