You’re saying the abuse would be better if she weren’t pregnant?

All adults should protect children, whether they’re parents or child-free. We all have a responsibility to look after the little guys, you know? And I just can’t square the idea the abuse would lean more towards acceptable if this woman hadn’t been pregnant.

To be absolutely clear: I’m not defending this sentient piece of dogshit, and I totally agree with you that she shouldn’t be within a million miles of any kid (or, frankly, any adult. Or animal. Or tree. Or bacterial microbe).

Wait, how does her doing this while pregnant make it more disgusting? I’m pretty sure we’ve already hit peak awful here, right?

This is......this is marvellous.

I’m sure it is! I have no cranky feelings about beat poetry whatsoever. I just.......don’t think about it. Should I? What beat poetry should I know about?

Sorry about your mum. It’s always heartbreaking to lose somebody that you love. I hope her breasts weren’t deflated, though.

I have no opinion about Kris Jenner—she occupies the same region of my brain that I reserve for beat poetry, pocket lint and cream of wheat—but I do know that you and your fellow squalid little shitmittens are the last people that older women should be taking fashion advice from. Get the fuck outta here, you…

Here’s how to make that happen faster: don’t give pageclicks to posts about the Kardashians. As soon as you and everyone else stops clicking and commenting, the sooner Jezebel will stop paying attention to them. The economics of the thing are very simple.

I think it can be emotionally disorientating either way. You’re trying to tell yourself that you don’t actually care, and you shouldn’t, but you still get this weird adrenaline rush hijacking your body. It’s physiological more than psychological. All that pent-up anticipation surges through you like a river in flood,…

Narnia for shut-ins. You are spectacular. I want to make love to this comment.

One of the best things I learned recently is that Jane Leeves is best friends with (and lives next door to!) Peri Gilpin. And that Gilpin, David Hyde Pierce and John Mahoney are her kids’ godparents. Conspicuously absent from Leeves’ loving familial warmth? Ohhhhhhh, you know it. The pink-faced fucker with the snazzy…

It’s ok. Been there. I recommend alcohol in vast quantities.

Crassness is always forgiveable if it’s funny. This is just limp shit, man.

You remind me of that grimly hilarious line of Tom Leher’s about how political satire died the day that Henry Kissinger won the Nobel Peace Prize. That fucking guy was a walking war crime.

Also, cut off all foreign aid to all countries now!! China now has the largest economy in the world...let them pick up the fucking slack!

Not bad round here either. Currently on holiday at my parents’s place in Maine. Eating a diet that consists chiefly of blueberries, lobster and maple syrup, usually in combination with one another. Shitloads of rain, though. Glad to hear the neeps are treating you well (I always worry that my turnip relatives will…

This person is in very great need of attention. This person likely does not have an emotionally rewarding home life. This person probably needs a nap and for someone to tell him that they love him.

Nah, no soapbox. Just a basic respect for privacy laws.

I would not advise taking pictures of a naked person while they’re on private property, regardless of whether they’re out of doors or not, and regardless of whether you’re a paparazzi photographer or not. There are specific Peeping Tom laws that deal explicitly with these kinds of abuses of privacy (and indeed, sexual…