Q: What are the odds of a race car driver hitting a jet dryer?

The driver in the car..... “WHAT THE FUCK YOU FILMING IN PORTRAIT FOR”

So much hype around the Dodge Demon and yet this Nissan Maxima is clearly a hell of a drag racer.

Oh, man. I’m a defense attorney and “cop talk” is so infuriating.

“After exiting my cruiser, I approached the domicile with my standard issue service weapon remaining holstered on my right side. After surveying the grounds, I indicated my presence by activating the doorbell. When the occupant responded and unlatched…

“Sir, I pulled you over because the time-averaged derivative of your location measured by this laser interferometer has exceeded the specified local maximum.”

Yeah. Sometimes people go over the top. But sometimes they go so far over the top, so far past anything that could be considered sane, that the focus and determination and the single-minded obsession are what make the build. These guys are freaks. Absolute freaks. In the best, best, best possible way.

Cars should be somewhat fun, IMO. Maybe you can buy this and have fun in it, but these guys sound like they’re just not having fun anymore, or it’s a different type of fun than I’m into. Like whips and leather or something.

How about the time I got hit by a truck on my motorcycle. My wife was down the street eating lunch. She and her friends saw all the first responders hauling ass down the street from the restaurant. She joked to them, “Oh shit. Somebody’s dead.”

WTF? There was nothing brave about that. Do you even know the meaning of the word? Sure, kudos to the reporter for keeping it together, but, don’t go calling her brave. It’s not like she was in any danger.

*ahem*

There is real flooding in the deserts. Just ask the poor folks in Arizona.

I like Dirt Every Day’s Duster:

Toyota be like

WHAT?

The dumbest shit I modded my car with was my ex-husband.

Wire mesh grilles made out of Home Depot gutter guard material. To make it worse, I did it to two different cars.

In a pre-good-camera-phone-era, I took out the back seat of a Mazda 323 hatch, made a custom fiberglass enclosure, and put three Alpine 15s and a 1,500 watt bridged amp in there — hauling space be damned.

“Illegal” just means you have to make your own...

Gotta go against you on that "don't bring your own helmet" thing. Don't know where you're at, Alex, but there's no way in hell I'm sharing a helmet with the general Los Angeles public, especially after I spent good money on my own. I say bring your own helmet and don't talk shit.