See, Don, nothing to worry about! ‘Not a criminal target’- that’s basically the same thing as ‘no collusion’, wouldn’t you say? Maybe some expendable lackeys go down for some quickly-forgotten stuff, but you? You’re fiiiiine. Just need to do this one quick little interview- y’know, dot some t’s and cross some i’s for…

“According to CNN, the real culprit behind the Postal Service’s massive loss is the fact that it owes “billions in retirement obligations to its workers that it can’t afford.”’

Hahahahaha! The thought of TrumplThinSkin squeezing those tiny baby hands into fists made me snort coffee out my nose. Biden would PUMMEL him. PUMMEL HIM! Papaya Pol Pot’s head would be bouncing back and forth faster than the spring of my doorstop that the cat pulls to wake me up in the morning. I would pay to see…

Maybe it’s time for Andrew Breitbart to personally step in and become a more involved day to day Editor in Chief, as opposed to the hands off style he’s been doing since March 2012.

*significant federal regulation and surveillance of bomb-making materials/guides*

In my mind’s eye, I see the aftermath of the explosion in which he killed himself. As the dust clears, and the echoes die down, the only motion is the gentle fluttering of a shredded red baseball cap as it descends from the lofty peak of its arc; it comes to rest on the hood of the destroyed car and slumps, puddled, a…

I guarantee you that Blake Farenthold would fall for this.

I’m the complete opposite. I think Kim will shower Trump with compliments, Trump will walk out talking about howKim is a great and misunderstood guy, and NK will manipulate Trump into giving them whatever they want.

I can very easily understand the White House’s disgust with those gaming clips.

I don’t.

We open on a little girl, black with pigtails, in a Walmart, eyeing a new Avengers play set. A Walmart employee, black, female kneels next to her and looks at the toy set. “Oh, that’s a nice one.” The employee notes. “Think my mom will get it for me?” The girl asks. “Well, maybe if you work really hard and ace your…

Don’t forget the GOP/NRA want her to have a gun in the classroom.

FIFY:

Ya know, I’m fine with some random douchebag with a cursory understanding of how government works being elected because that at least means he has engaged in some sort of education. Trump isn’t even that. The bro-est bro from the partyest party school would be a better president.

I’ll bet he jacked up his muscles 7,000%!

Was the Clapback Mailbag running light this week? You are going to get so many misspelled missives from morons who are missing melanin.

What a fucking snowflake with his whining about wanting to be protected from being violently gunned down in school.

What Paul Ryan doesn’t understand is that people are corporations too (I like to call them “corporation-creators”), and therefore also need tax incentives to stay viable.

C’mon guys, stop being so pessimistic. What you call a dollar fifty a week is actually a one million dollar tax cut over 12,777 years.

.ssecorp eht tsurT