Do you think she gives a toss? She must have known, and I doubt Stormy Daniels was the first or last. The public humiliation, maybe...

Exactly. The subtext of all these comments complaining about consent isn’t basically “Why can’t I just carry on doing what I want when it comes to sex.”

I don’t think you have addressed any of this. You’ve said people being enthusiastically and obviously into having sex with each other is “too abstract.” You’ve also complained that men “aren’t mindreaders.”

Nothing super about it. Careful thought is all. Solving problems and then having a lie down is basically my daily life!

Doggy style itself isn’t necessarily vanilla; a little imagination and banging someone you’re really into can be pure filth.

I don’t really think in those terms, so I don’t have one. It seems to be more of a male thing.

You and everyone else who keep telling rape survivors to verbalise non-consent. We did. That’s why it’s rape.

I’ve thought about this. In return for world peace, and end to inequality, shitloads of money for me and everyone I know and love, and death to my enemies, I would agree to bend over a sofa for a few minutes of vanilla doggy style.

As for your comment about enthusiastic consent, if you can’t be bothered to make sure your partner is enjoying it, or asking seems like too much of a big deal, you shouldn’t be having sex.

We do teach women to say no in a clear unequivocal way. It doesn’t always work.

I know that. But I did use my voice and it didn’t stop him, so maybe remember that every time you imply that women who get raped didn’t do enough to stop their rapists by telling survivors to remember to say no next time.

Except it does. Consent should be enthusiastically given.

Vile, victim-blaming pieces of shit, aren’t they?

And for a very long time in private too,

Nobody is arguing for women to helplessly lie back and accept their rapes. It’s a sad state of affairs that until men change and understand what consent is, there will continue to be millions of women and other men who say “Me too.” And it’s great that you are so mindful of all this, and trying to do so much in your…

How are any further attempts to engage in sexual activity after she said she didn’t want to “respecting her wishes”?

I am empowered. I was raped by someone I trusted. I am not a victim.

Consenting to one act doesn’t mean consent to others. “No” is the end of negotiations. Ansari, like so many other men, heard this woman say she didn’t want to have sex, and kept trying, as if “no” is the start of the negotiations, some kind of movable wall that will fall down if you just push hard enough at it.

I know. It’s only the sense of trying to stop them perpetuating this bullshit that makes me keep replying.

So, when you teach your daughters how to “ensure their own safety”, does that mean you will tell them not to spend the night in a room with male friends? Not to be alone with men? That’s the only answer. It’s the only thing that would have changed things for me; if I had just treated my friend with suspicion and not…