Carter Page could try to steal 3¢ from the “take a penny, leave a penny” dish at a 7-11, and end up making $20 million in Bitcoin disappear.

Oh, I just drive my wife to and from the meetings. But I am in charge of making sure she has the updated secret password for every meeting. So, for Tuesday the 12th, at you know where, the password will be, lemme see... Ah! It’s “LOL, Rolphe.”

Like, does she thing MILLIONS of women get together on the regular and agree on an “official position” on each topic?

Here’s an “all too easy” clip the Daily Show put together showing exactly why Page is the guy you want to have a crack at, if you’re a police interrogator, a lawyer on cross-examination, or a poker player:

Boston in general is number one.

I looked her up and couldn’t believe that she’s 47.

Ninja Rocks: A genuine piece of forbidden technology that I must not, CANNOT even mention to my 8 y.o. niece or troublemaking 10~12 y.o. cousins.

Fuckin double standard in this country is getting WAAAAAY out of hand.

Life called him, and he answered magnificently. God grant that, if I ever face such a call, I can answer with a tenth of his heart and will.

Pinche Damon Young, man. Now every time I watch a clip of Tyronn Lue coaching Matthew Dellavedova, all I’m going to see is Fred Sanford roasting Rollo.

It’s deliciously kharmic and undoubtedly just that the legislator/harrasser introduced to us in the article Arizona Representative Who Described His ‘Genitalia as a Gun’ Offers Non-Apology literally had his gun confiscated in the course of his expulsion.

This article has some (rightfully) heavy discussion going on, so please allow me to offer a moment of lightness for everyone who loves Sexy Sax Guy:

Laws do not exist to protect everyone. Miscegenation laws, Jim Crow laws, and “religious freedom” laws that allow a restaurants to deny service to a hand-holding couple that happen to be of the same sex can hardly be said to exist for the protection of “everyone.”

Yeah, I’m pretty sure Sitzpinkler’s (seriously, that fuckin’ name!) point is that, via Watters’ argument, he should believe that Furman’s cartoonishly extreme racism makes OJ’s guilt an impossibility.

Er, read Sitzpinkler’s (oy, that name!) question again. I think you missed his point. Furman’s under-oath racism didn’t change the fact that OJ can find the “real killers” in a bathroom mirror.

Well done! Now, just sprinkle a generous amount of the following words to crank up that “translated from the Chinese via Google Translate” feel:

Fascinating stuff, once again, from our man Torch. Sure, Brock was tragically gullible. But remember, you’re reading this in a day when you could lay out $250k right now, on the promise that in 2 years, you’ll receive a car that goes from 0 to 60 mph in 1.9 seconds, has a top speed of 250 mph, and will take you 244…

I have no idea what Epcot’s security is like, but stealing any liquor from anywhere while on a HS outing is damn impressive.

I’ve got to raise an eyebrow at you saying that you steal anything from Target on the regular. Maybe their security policies have loosened up a huge amount from way back in the 90s, but I’ve always understood Target to be pretty maniacal about inventory shrinkage. I’ve known more than a few people who worked there,…

Until I was in my early 40s, I conflated the turn-of-the-century Italian opera, Madama Butterfly with the late 19080s play/early 1990s film, M. Butterfly. I was extremely confused as to how a male actor in the Peking Opera managed to have his heart broken by his American lover’s betrayal after bearing his child.