I’m half Italian and I approve this message.

Italian here as well. We have great aunts, uncles, cousins, etc that we’ve NEVER even met because of an argument during WWII and the one of the 50-60's World Series.

My polling place is in my neighborhood and is staffed by neighborhood ol’ biddies. Not only do I have to show up at my polling place looking like a dime on fire lest I hear the gossip later, “Drunk Lady” works at the polling place

And do this.

My husband hates that show and I’m convinced it’s because I cannot control my utter glee at every nekkid shot of Justin Theroux it had to offer. Jen upgraded and has no reason to look back. Like, I don’t even really find Men In General that attractive anymore (Mr. Urp is an exception), but JT stirs me.

Yeah, if we want to be shallow (and why the hell not, this is a Dirt Bag post), we can point out that Jen has since moved on to a younger and very handsome man who appears to bathe far more often than her ex. Why would anyone think that she’s still secretly pining for Pitt?

I can barely tell you what that show is about because I’m just watching him talk and run shirtless

He’s so fucking hot. I watched two seasons of The Leftovers not knowing Aniston was hitting that. Girl’s doing just fine.

that’s an overweight (white) man of a certain age talking... my dad talks about (women) being fat like it’s the worst thing they could possibly be... meanwhile he looks like he’s smuggling a pony keg under his too tight shirt.

Not to mention his attack dog, Chris Christie, is probably close to 400 pounds and often sits on a bed.

Yeah, and meanwhile--Hillary couldn’t have cleared her throat--let alone {gasp} COUGHED--broken a slight sweat, sniffled, or practically LET A SINGLE HAIR FALL OUT OF PLACE or she would have been accused of succumbing to Ebola before our very eyes.

I think my ex finds it pretty fun.

Congratulations! Solid decision and I support you in it. Here, have this gif of a kitten in a box:

just found out am 6 weeks pregnant, no one knows but hubby and myself, for the sake of my health and the nuggets’, i’ll be watching storks at my local theatre then non stop puppy videos until i pass out and wake up tomorrow :)

My father molested me when I was young - I have repressed this far, far away and don’t care for it to ever come out.

I love her so much :heart eyes emoji over and over:

I get mad at her not for supporting him (all of his kids are completely financially dependent on him). I do get mad at her because she doesn’t just support him in this run, she encouraged him to run, is an integral part of the campaign, and came up with that bullshit childcare policy (that was tailor-made for Ivanka…

I feel confused over why Hillary gets described as being as cold and unfeeling as a robot. Hilly C makes me cry more consistently than dogs greeting soldiers back from war.

Does it even work? If so, why???

Lots of folks aren’t ok with this news, but as an ex wife whose husband is still with the mistress, I say...