Right? I was trying to explain the Jimmy Carr QI masterpiece where he was given a magnetic board full of random letters, and produced the magnificent phrase “Put Smarties tubes on cats’ legs, make them walk like a robot” to a friend, and they derailed the entire conversation (and significantly diminished their own…

At my old retail job (Smithsonian, so semi-federal) we got double time for shit like that, but at least she’s getting SOMETHING.

I just bought a bunch of work clothes & some winter boots I couldn’t afford yesterday - I’ve just started a new job, in a much-colder state, and my first paycheck hasn’t hit yet. I never judge people for taking advantage of a sale that exists to be taken advantage of. All my considerable ire exists only for the…

To answer the question: yes, absolutely, as long as we’re talking about online Black Friday. I’m not willing to bludgeon a woman with my purse for a cheap TV.

I made homemade cranberry sauce for the first time last year, and now I’m actually enraged every time I think about it because it’s so easy, and tastes so much better than the canned crap. Opening the can is just barely easier than making it from scratch, and the taste is so much better if you do it properly. Canned…

Sorry, I didn’t realize “24 and never been kissed” was synonymous with “an emotional child with no sense of appropriate boundaries or how to behave with other humans.” I get that the lack of experience is part of why LW got into this situation, but the fable-spinning and the micromanaging tendencies don’t actually…

I think you’ve hit the nail on the head with the childlike imagination + adult concepts idea. It’s like they’ve spent so much time thinking about what relationships might be like like that at the first hint of ANY kind of relationship, including platonic, they jumped all over it and now they’re in a soap opera plot…

I think it’s important to point out that while, yes, the boy in question is trash and we’ve all met that exact same kind of trash, the LW is also being very naive and immature, and in a way where I think most of us have been that person, too.

The bit you excerpted is exceptionally cringe-inducing. I’m a little bit older than “late 20's,” but I’m pretty close, and I cannot. fucking. imagine what I would have felt like at 29 to realize that some 24-year old coworker I hung out with sometimes was considering micromanaging my life for fear that if they didn’t,…

I dunno about that. It’s fine for you to not be willing to accept an apology, or feel better, or forgive Lous C.K. for the shit he’s done. You don’t need to find reasons that the apology isn’t good enough to justify that - you just don’t want to! I think it’s a good apology, which doesn’t mean anything about the way…

Thanks! I don’t know if you remember, but about a year ago I mentioned to you that I was trying to get into immigration services work, and that finally went through! So yeah, I’m very excited!

I’m moving to Minneapolis from Virginia RIGHT NOW (no joke, that is literally a thing I’m doing) and the fact that both places did the same important thing at the same time is making me feel so good about this move.

My best friend from Sudan became a U.S. citizen a few weeks ago, and when she voted in the VA election today, it was her first time voting in her life. I know it takes the participation of all of us to make these important things happen, but in my opinion her individual vote was crucial to this success. 

Am I supposed to eat Papa John’s or not?

It’s also so funny to me that one of the only characters who is just profoundly bad (never gets a funny line to make you like him for a moment, never gets a glimmer of backstory to explain himself) is Mr. Wheeler, a man who we have all known 20 of, the banalest of all evils. He’s presented as truly reprehensible in a…

Exactly. No one who punches his son and accuses him of being gay simply for looking at himself in the mirror is going to be super-psyched and “welcome to the family!” when they get Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?’d by their 13-year-old daughter.

You are never more than 252,088 miles away from the moon.

See, roaches are gross and I Do Not Like Them, but after living in Sudan in an apartment where they were there in huge quantities when I moved in and only seemed to multiply, and there’s no such career as pest exterminator, I learned how to basically deal. I went through two big cans of poison spray a week, and each…

Privilege is enough to get you into Yale. Privilege is never going to get you into Yale at 15, otherwise every Hilton and Trump would have done it.

Tens of people have already hit him up with the necessary discussion of why his opinions are bad and wrong (and there is literally no other sensible way to engage) at varying levels of politeness, only to have fucking War and Peace written at them on the subject of how he can’t even be held accountable for remembering…