In that case I’m sorry that your mother, sisters, aunts, friends, and all other females in your life (and Google!) have somehow failed to pass on this basic information. You’re all up to speed on how babby gets made, though, right?

I know, it’s such a drag when people think it’s weird I don’t know basic day-to-day information relevant to half the world’s population, including the people with whom I share my home and my life. That’s just, like, girl stuff. I’m not gay!

Unless Smith happens to be one of the unidentified speakers, which seems unlikely as it would involve a Sheriff hanging out around the desk of a Deputy Sergeant, he’s not on this recording. It’s brought up more as a measure of exactly how fucked the people who are on this recording are, insulting someone who works for…

Nothing is funnier than hearing men talk about something they know nothing about. “No, no bro, I swear, she had, like sextuple D’s!” Sure, bro. Sure.

I lived in Sudan last year, and my host family got their milk from a guy who drove around the neighborhood in a donkey cart every day with a big urn of fresh milk on the back. And let me tell you, it was WORK to make that milk suitable for drinking. The family had a set of milk scalding pans that were JUST for milk…

I hope she actually gets pegged as Walker’s running mate. That way we can have a ballot with one guy who never finished college, and another who attended six colleges in five years to get her B.A. It’d be beautiful. One person who couldn’t hack it through undergrad, and another who was just so good at it she couldn’t…

Right? I went to school with a PB&J every day until high school, and my mother went off to work as a firefighter and, later, paramedic. I was fine. I still can’t cook (and don’t like to) but I have a badass mom and a great work ethic so I think it evens out. When I see all these precious, twee little boxed lunches,…

Average High-School Drop Out, Got His Girlfriend Pregnant at 17, Hoping This Current Scare Isn’t Another On the Way, Once Considered Asking His Wife to Stick Her Finger in his Ass While They’re Doing It but Couldn’t Get Up the Courage, Doesn’t Know What the ‘Bud’ in ‘Bud Light’ is Short For, Will Work in the Mill…

I believe the part where it’s jarring is the point of doing it. It may not be a style that you enjoy, but the fact that it’s doing what it’s intended to do is not a particularly strong argument against it.

Right? I’m not from New Orleans, but I think I’d definitely be more mad at the people actively wishing for the drowning death of the black people in their city than I’d be about the researchers who got details wrong after the fact. Like, I can care about more than one thing at once, but I’d imagine I’d be so mad at…

This was essentially the argument of my mother’s boyfriend when I pointed out that the “dietary supplement” goo he was adding to his drinks contained arsenic and mercury. The supplements didn’t help him lose weight, and he died at 49 of a massive heart attack. Go figure!

This is very good news, indeed! I mean, my teeth aren’t markedly whiter or straighter than anyone else’s I’ve seen around the world, but I do have that flat accent and golden-retriever outgoing friendliness that we Americans are known for.

You certainly deserve the thanks more than W.

Also, while this is common in fundamentalist households, it’s not exclusive to them. I very much grew up in a house where mom was allowed to feel everything, but everyone else was only allowed to be neutral, because if anyone else was feeling negative, it was an attack on mom, and if anyone else was feeling positive,…

I’m there October 4th - 7th, so not too long, but if you wanted to have a beer or something of an evening that’d be grand!

It’s tough, because I’m going to 4 places on this trip, 2 rural and 2 urban (London, Kirkwall, Oslo, and Orkney) and I’d like to go with one medium rolly suitcase. But I want to be cute in the urban places, properly dressed for the rural places, AND warm, which means bulky sweaters and a coat. This is seriously the…

I’ll take 3 of each please and thanks.

OMG do you want to meet up? Not to get laid, obvs., but if you want to meet for a drink w/me and my friend let me know. We are both charming and 100% not serial killers.

I’m not so much the marrying kind, but for a shot at a red passport I’d definitely consider it.

You should go alone. I’m going with a friend because he’s got relatives we can stay with for free, but I’ve traveled alone a LOT and it’s generally my strong preference.