you’re a real smart ass, I like that!

It’s like the 50’s promise of jet packs, sounds cool but unrealistic

I want to hear more about Grandpa Hirtz, he sounds like a hoot, come on tell!

“This is good, because everyone who uses Twitter is a fucking sociopath.” you said this and you use twitter? I don’t use twitter btw.

My maternal grandmother, whom my mother referred to as Sarah Bernhardt of suburbia, due to her melodramatic histrionics, was prone to complaining about almost everything. One day mother was driving grandmother somewhere and me and my brother, who was about 4 at the time were in the back seat. After about 20 mins of…

If you picked me up and did all that AND Keb Mo was playing I’d kiss you on the cheek and say “Best girlfriend ever”

Well at least they didn't call you Spotted Dick

My Mom was that quick she could insult somebody so sweetly that they would thank her afterwards not realizing what she said was no compliment. Must have been the Irish blood being raised in the south.

had a similar encounter and I replied “Yes and tomorrow I can go on a diet, but your unique brand of ugly is forever.”

ahh Heinlein when my contemporaries in 6th grade were reading A Wrinkle In Time, I was engaged with Stranger In A Strange Land. No wonder I'm so weird.

https://www.google.com/…/@48.9972768,…Proof that Canadian Cows are set to invade America. Get your bbq’s and forks and knives ready!

I was bartending at a bar I co-owned when one of the customers got a little too drunk loud and obnoxious and I refused to serve her anymore. "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?" She screams at me at full volume. "I WANT TO TALK TO THE OWNER OR MANAGER RIGHT FU*KING NOW!!" spit flying arms flailing. Ok I say and I walk into the…

yep, makes a great tool to bury the people you killed with carabiner brass knuckles

they make a great pair of brass knuckles

omg I've been doing it right all these years! I was taught by a Korean friend of my fathers from the war there. I wonder if that's why I get so much respect from my local sushi restaurants. They always remember me and treat me like royalty, of course that may be due to the 25% tip I leave.

My parents ran a diner in the 50's while going to college. They had an annoying customer that came in everyday told everyone what was wrong with them, made rude sexist remarks to my mother and made a general nuisance out of himself. He always ordered the Chicken Fried Steak strips that were a special of the restaurant…

I don't have white guilt I suffer from white embarrassment, embarrassment at the blind ignorance of my privileged white brothers and sisters. I treat people the way I want to be treated. I look everyone in the eye and try my best not to make conclusions and judgments. I feel the pain of those less fortunate, having…

When I first saw the receipt I thought the customer was either dissatisfied with the service or he was a cheapskate, Then I noticed the pound instead of dollar sign and realized the low tip amount was standard in the U.K.. The next thing that struck me was the total amount. Here in the U.S. 69.90 + 6.99 = 76.89 not…