that’s some Rachel Dolezal level denialism right there.

To be fair, Schwimmer also looks a lot like Russ:

Conspiracy theories about the Palin family’s spawn is the only interesting thing about them.

oh jeez just steer those two to the fuckin shuffleboard deck

We don’t have many celebrities where I live and the local weatherman is getting real sick of me.

He is most likely a surfer/bank robber.

The cops wasted several hours questioning the band Naked Raygun on a tip proven to be false

I remember taking those columns so seriously as a kid, thinking 'God, what a horrible human being'.

I don’t know if her dad is a chef, but I once saw him making her grits and putting slices of Kraft singles in it, so maybe “chef” is a malleable term?

“I think that Michelle Obama’s on Ellen more than I am”

He’s used to shade, what with being in Chris Farley’s shadow for 20+ years. Oh, and John Ritter’s shadow, come to think of it. Doesn’t he have any live people to exploit?

Funny embarrassing story about David Spade: I worked at one of the 3 bars in Big Bear Lake in 2001. This little guy (literally, he’s tiny) brought an underage girl with him and demanded to be let in.

I think David Spade should realise he’s over 50 and stop using terms he’s far too old to use.

Question: has “thirsty” officially jumped the shark?

“The Saturday Night Live alum, who most recently starred in Adam Sandler’s The Ridiculous 6 and Joe Dirt 2: Beautiful Loser...”

Seriously. Came here to say this. When was the last time David Spade had anything relevant to say?

My cousin has been shown being arrested on local news twice this year which means he too has been on tv more than David Spade.

Um, maybe you’re the thirsty one David Spade. Nobody gives any sort of fuck what you think about basically anything.

Why is there a picture of Gérard Depardieu?