*blows anti-Disney truther whistle that only internet idiots can hear*

The refs cheated.

Dick Manley

“Hey kids, why don’t you hide out in a boring ass furniture store overnight! So cool!”

This movie came out the summer between my fifth and sixth grade year. It was the last movie I remember that had a ticket line that stretched around the corner of the theater. The high fashion statement the entire year of 1989 was a solid black t-shirt with a yellow Batman logo. Literally everywhere you looked, someone…

He’s a gyro to his people.

Any excuse I get to post a photo of Vince Wilfork nude, I take.

Pretty sure you’re thinking of the ESPN magazine’s annual Body Issue.

Greta Gremlin was the first (and only) trans gremlin.

This week is a Dawes kinda week.

On lead single “Half Life,” Duchovny calls upon archaeology*, the sexiest of the sciences, to muse, “Unconditional love decays / Only fossilized hearts can break / Every piece is indivisible.” 

The Drop. It’s a Brooklyn accent, but some people, commies most likely, consider that an American accent. There’s also the horsey movie with Leonardo DiCaprio. 

I hate that this movie is a thing.

If your math is correct, and I think it is, well, that’s almost four decades!

I’m still holding out for a movie.

So again, what you’re actually saying is, “Oh God, save me from parents who don’t want their child’s brain to literally be pummeled into sludge and their non-cognitively impaired children!”

Cloverfield 4: Four Leaf Clover

You’re right, nothing could ever be as stupid as that. That, again for those reading along, is this:

I don’t really want to put my kids in situations where they are willingly smashing their developing brains around inside their skulls.

Wait, you mean you’ve never been engulfed in a cloud of thousand-degree volcanic ash and then come out unscathed? Amateur.