“Report: A Body Has Been Found at Apple Headquarters”

I am a Millennial
I studied and am employed in Marketing, allow me to marketing fluff-up my sentiments on this heap:

Even more ridiculous than the fire is the fact that they put it out.

Nothing new for the opposing team, though.

im just here for all the blind side jokes......

It looks like a Lincoln

The Asterion. It looks refined for a modern Lamborghini, and it’s a hybrid.

This will soon be the most popular car in Palo Alto.

They seem to have a Tardis!

Without a doubt it is the Aston Martin DB9. Still gushed over 12 years after it’s debut. Hell, there weren’t any reasonable grumblings about it being an “old” design until a few years ago. I believe those criticisms were made only because someone realized that it was 10 years old and unfair to every other car to still…

Being coked out of your mind and getting gratuitous head on your way to the supermarket is the ultimate “driving experience”

What’s it like being 12?

Two things: “gay” is a seriously weak insult, and the Miata is awesome.

How about fuck you instead?

You do realize that fiberglass yellows as it oxidizes, right?

The paint’s chipped.

What do you think, should we invite him back?

After reading Jalopnik for 3 years, I finally feel like I have something worth contributing as my first ever comment. (TL;DR: It's a funny story, read it if you have a minute).