"and after a few months I would get bored and sell it to a kid who uses the phrase "should of" in text messages." Pure gold. You've quickly become my favorite writer on Jalopnik's staff. Keep 'em coming.

This might be a stupid question but does the after effect keep on going indefinitely or does it eventually decay?

You thought Clarkson punching a producer was bad? During his short stint as a Top Gear host, Patrick Bateman managed to surreptitiously murder one of his cohosts, an Indonesian prostitute, 2 cameramen, and a senior producer before somehow convincing The Stig to be his getaway driver.

subtle

The best thing my parents ever taught me about dog ownership is the "Whistle n Missile". The general idea is that you have a rolled up sock and a can full of loose change handy during the housebreaking process, and if you catch the dog exhibiting a negative behavior, you shake the can and toss the sock at him/her. It…

I think you've got your contributors mixed up. Doug is the CarMax Guru, Tavarish shows us Mercedes Benzes that you can get for less than the price of a Kia Rio. Solid effort, though.

Thank you for clearing that up, I was pretty puzzled as to why they didn't include that in the article!

Not when this exists

I once dated a girl who drove a PT Cruiser and was legitimately hurt when I made fun of it. I was completely shocked when she told me she actually loved and enjoyed driving this car. Needless to say, the relationship didn't last long.

truly the darkest timeline

Volcanic Lightning would be a badass band name.

I would drive the shit out of that car. Especially if they kept the winglights. Winglights are neat.

for a 4Runner that's barely out of the break in period

That's what I've heard (and experienced) as well. Last time I checked craigslist/ebay I found more than a couple of examples with more than 400k miles on them that seemed to be in pretty decent condition. We didn't really experience much rust on ours either, even after enduring Midwestern winters for a good 10+years.…

You know what? I'm glad you hate Toyotas so much, because it means there are more fantastic, unbelievably reliable, well built trucks for the rest of us. Also, your username is accurate on both accounts.

You're joking, right? My family bought a 1999 4Runner new and one of us has driven it ever since, in close to 300k miles we still haven't had to do a major repair that wasn't related to an accident. I think the starter finally had to be replaced about 5,000 miles ago but these things are pretty damn hard to kill.

After watching my father, myself, my younger brother, and now our younger cousin all do our damndest to destroy our 1999 SR5 (and fail), all I have to say is good luck.

Wait so you're calling me ignorant after posting that you thought a Chevy Cruze was better than a Tesla on an article ABOUT Tesla? Seems legit. I never called your car shit, I said you really can't compare the two cars because no sane person would ever cross shop a Cruze and a Model S, just like nobody would ever…

You're comparing apples to oranges. The Model S is a powerful luxury car aimed closer to BMW and Mercedes, while your Cruze is an economy car with fewer amenities, much less power, and a much less luxurious ride than the Tesla has. By your logic we should all be cruising around in old Kia Rios.

I'd rather see a beautiful car hooned than made into a garage queen or babied so that it never reaches it's true potential.