BRIAN BLESSED!!!

I'd rather meet at there place.

That's why he's got that trying-to-cross-his-legs-pose going on in most crucifixes.

Mrs periscopes and I moved - after much discussion - to take my new job, and follow a desire to move back to my hometown, five years ago.

Ben's?

Dammit - Mrs periscopes is allergic. She always has the best excuses.

Like a camp beauty parade?

"I wouldn't say I'm the best, but I'm in the top one"

Not enough people outside of British "red-top rags" (The Sun, The Mirror et al) use the word "romp".

Speaking of all human life being present, I would play it The Divine Comedy's "National Express". It has the added bonus of a great video.

I know a Luka - he's Turkish.

What-are-you-some-kind-of-hyphen-Nazi?

That's what they're called in Australia - something to do with tasting like bullfrogs.

They're bloody poisonous mate! If you ever get bitten by a dunny rabbit, yer'll be chundering for a week.

They really were terrible. Quite how they got so popular, I do not know.

We generally refer to them as "weird American sweets that we don't get over here". That or "fuzzlesnotches".

Anybody else really hungry for fruit-flavoured chewy sweets after seeing the subliminal advertising in the picture? Mmm, trash candy.

My favourite awkward interview:

*unicycles periscope*

I think that A&M may struggle, due to English contract law, in particular the "bagsies" rule as instigated in Carlill v Carbolic Smokeball Company, and later ratified by Lord Denning.