Conventional wisdom dictates Pat Tillman, Troy Aikman, or maybe Deon Sanders. Personally I would go with Dwyane Wade though because I like to party.

Someone should tell Magic little digs like this is how Phil Jackson started out......

What really grinds my gears is that “vajazzling” isn’t even anatomically correct. Pubic-region-jazzling just doesn’t have the same ring, though. Vulvazzling would be more painful if true to its name but it’s also a very good word. Pros and cons.

Those are . . . those are real tweets? An at least semi-respected publication with decades of print history actually used “vajazzled”?

Nothing says, “While you’re here, feel free to rub one out,” like the SI Swimsuit issue.

SI Swimsuit Issue, For the classy dad or when you want to leave your house-guests some casual jerkoff material in your bathroom.

You will need a screwdriver, a pair of tweezers, a magnifying glass (optional), some salt (~1tbsp), and a bag of chicken feed, preferably corn-based.

I enjoyed Mark Jackson assuring viewers that “these are two of the best defenses in the league.”

The friction goes all the way back to the beginning, when Mike thought his name should be first.

Based 100% on seeing their faces in motion on the TV at the gym with no sound, plus one of their subway ads, I feel like I’d like Golic better.

Patrick: A whole bunch = Two things

The game really wasn’t that exciting. I think Patrick’s trying to put lipstick on a Puig here.

Damn, can’t believe I’m gonna highlight truther a Puig story, but come on man. 1 highlight is a play where he didn’t throw a guy out. The other is a play where he would have been out on a good throw? This is low-level Puig.

You’re actually an idiot.

#NEVERFORGET

“How many testicles does he have?”

Can someone explain to me why this is illegal? Why is it the government’s job to prosecute people who violate the NCAA’s policies. This would be like the state troopers showing up for an HR transgression.

Brian Kelly out here supporting his player like a construction lift in a wind storm.

Shoulda taken a beat, removed the USC shirt, and had another USC shirt underneath

Don’t worry, Utah. You had him at “Salt."