“if a 550 horsepower Kia can be had affordably, I might as well start cousin-fuckin’.”

In 2010, if you would have told me that I’d be lusting after a 500+ horsepower Kia crossover that could do 0-60 in 3.5 seconds, I’d have sooner told you I was likely to fornicate with a blood relative.

They started a land war in Asia and don’t even know it.

All these prim fuckers just out there looking to get offended. I would know nothing about these shoes if not for the multiple headlines this morning about this specific beef.

Good thing I saw this headline reminder about the Bristol race being on dirt. I’ll certainly watch this race now. Will be the first Nascar race I’ve watched in a while.  Shoot, I need to tell my Pops, he might actually watch, too.

So, I guess things didn’t work out between Coach Bombay and Charlie’s mom?  Were they already broken up by the end of the trilogy?  I’m pretty shaky on D2 and D3, aside from the hilarious bit where Iceland was the mean ubercompetitive team in the international competition.  

+1 for Lawrence again

“Luxury” and “Offroad” means a Land Rover or Range Rover (which are unreliable) or a Lexus GX, which will still be roaming the land after a nuclear apocalypse, so I agree with Lawrence’s suggestion.

I would even add a CPO Grand Cherokee to the mix. While not the most reliable vehicle out there, in certain trims you can…

“Three things are gonna happen bud, I hit you, you hit the ground, I go coach a Minnesota youth hockey team with your mom!”

bemulleted Ducks leader Coach T (Dylan Playfair)

No, man, this isn’t a piece shitting on the Richest Man In The World, this is a piece shitting upon some really awful UX decisions. Sad is not being able to deal with actual valid critiques of technology without feeling like it’s an attack on Elon Musk, who I suspect will weather this onslaught just fine.

they could do that, sure, or design a usable fucking shifter

Then buy more ham! (send me a check, Big Ham)

OMFG 3 POINT TURNS KILL ME

If we’re making up scenarios I’d like to suggest that she buried the money and anonymously left a treasure map with a series of clues the employee had to solve on their doorstep. But unfortunately, some pirates found it first.

She could have anonymously donated to the go fund me, in that case.

you know how rich people are: no limit to spending on themselves and to their kind but greedy and stingy when it comes to helping the poors

It doesn't mean on outside.  

Wouldn’t be wonderful if we had a system of health care that people wouldn’t have to depend on the kindness of strangers?

She is ugly!