THAT HAIL MARY PLAY I CALL IT THE DENTIST BECAUSE IT KILLED SOME LIONS FROM EXTREME LONG RANGE.

Calm down.

A-

Friends, here I am in my hat and my bones are now sand. I try to make the club push the ball to the flat circle and all I get is a twist and a screech and oops my liver has divorced itself from my body and now lives in Malibu with a beautiful husband named Rick. I drove my helicopter to my private swinging course and…

Nihilist Tiger’s PR team should reach out to Nihilist Arby’s for an endorsement deal.

It hasn't been as widely reported, but Andy Dalton was also walking gingerly after their game.

Before any of you get on Patrick for not mentioning the injury that defined this game, remember that Petchesky is holding a gun to his head while daring him to mention #87 on New England.

Gainesville cops catch the ball, but don’t really do anything with it.

9 letters (-1 letter) Coincidence?

A planned parenthood in Ohio was the only place that would treat me when I was having pregnancy complications with no health insurance. I was visiting family, and just found out I was pregnant the day before I left. I woke up one morning during my visit with intense cramping and severe bleeding. I had no idea what to…

“...I’ll answer the question, whatever, but I don’t know why you even bother.”

I’m...I’m kidding. I’ve never even talked to a woman.

Holy shit I found something I hate even more than either of their comments.

There has to be someone affiliated with Deadspin that can pull off the mannerisms and affectations of an adolescent attendee.

Any QB who can go 8 - 1 with that schedule is incredible.

That must be why nobody ever died playing football in the early 20th century.

Go. Fuck. Yourself.