German nihilists? I mean, say what you want about the tenets of national socialism, dude, at least it’s an ethos...

And that’s why the tie-breaker was Jordan being in Space Jam 

I’m gonna go out on a limb and guess the Vikings don’t have particularly fond feelings for Blair Walsh.

Headlines from the future: Vikings sign Kris Cluwe, who is totally not that other guy who is way better than these other jabronis who cant kick their way out of a wet paper bag.

I would have ranked his role in Ragnorok a little higher, if only for the presentation of his stuff.

I will not discuss football over any sound amplifying device. This is my wedding present to them. I did however give a anti-Vikings best man speech in Minneapolis last year that was met with lukewarm reception from the natives

Actually would make more sense for a Bills fan.

With Johnson and Statham’s bald heads, the movie is much more enjoyable if you pretend that Idris’ super soldier is fighting two genetically-modified, sentient testicles.

The cat is both on and offsides until the video replay is confirmed.

...presumed to be a threat to the stability of the entire solar system...

It reminds me of masturbating in front of a fan.

I contacted every member of the US Men’s National Team to ask if they were happy about today’s result and if they like puppies. None responded and I think we can all agree that their silence speaks volumes.

Reminded me of this classic

I know a lot of people are going to take satisfaction and glee from this because of Marchand’s previous actions. But keep in mind.... just kidding, fuck that guy.

Bruins, especially Chara, definItely committed the most non-called penalties in fucking NHL playoff history. Sit the fuck down or go cry somewhere else.

uh, God’s not really a big fan of calves, especially Golden ones

Wasn’t expecting you to invoke the name of Achilles - what a heel turn.

as a scientist Bauer should be familiar with Kepler’s first law of baseball motion which states that a weak-ass pitch down in the zone swiftly becomes a parabola

I mean, if a friend looked at me the way that Aziraphale and Crowley look at each other, I would be like, “Why are you eye-fucking me, friend?”