*throws pants

Scientology's going to need to step up its evil game if it wants to stay relevant.

That one about the president bitching about the rapper on the internet.

Snoop does thing, Rubio says thing, yadda yadda yadda, Trump is a cocksucker.

Also, in India junkies are called jukies.

I'm surprised he and Henry Cavill haven't both OD'd on heroin.

Batman doesn't drink, Ben.

Emma Stone could've won another Oscar for this.

I'm playing Louis Farrakhan in an upcoming film by Joss Whedon.

That's a human ear, alright.

So Spotify can know where I am approximately if I share my location? And it can get weather reports from the internet? I just got chills.

Yes, there is a monster at the end of the movie.

In my opinion, it won't wash.

Nothing gets ground-in cheese curd stains out.

Gladiator 2: The Gladening

There's all kinds of science in that oven.

It no shit sounds to me like she needs to be hospitalized.

You don’t know where the hell she comes from! You have no idea what she's been through!

I think a gritty reboot of Bosom Buddies, gender-swapped and set at the Wall.

You got it!