Yeah the lyrics seem like one thing, but the seemingly definite plan-making with the accomplice in the comment thread is another; at least that’s what I’m assuming tipped the scales? Otherwise this would be très weird.

Yeah when I pickpocket I like to be standing right next to my victim expectantly when he discovers his wallet is gone.

Of all the fucking—WHY WOULD SOMEONE WORKING FOR TIPS STEAL YOUR WALLET RIGHT BEFORE THE PART WHERE YOU TIP THEM.

Oh god his intense sex face would medusa me and I’d be frozen doing this forever.

And lots of conversations that are not about Twitter but are definitely about Twitter.

“Bzzzzzzz!”

Oh definitely—I didn’t mean to suggest that teens should never be held responsible. And I still feel shitty about some of my behavior when I was that age. And people I hurt have every right to [continue to] hate me for it.

Yeah like holy shit if I was held responsible for things I said / did at that age?

Yes! And like a lil bit of prince omg I love her so much

Scientists DONT want you to know about things like KANGAROOS and AUSTRALIA.

Omg that's amazing

Ugh dot com backslash ugh backslash wut

I want this possible fart to become the hugest deal SO BAD.

[edited because I accidentally mentioned Madeleine’s criminal past.]

FULL DISCLAIMER: Haven’t pooped yet today.

Of fucking course.

The most frustrating part for me was that he DID run down a ten year old with a pick up truck and the kid was just like “oooh ouch eeee actually I’m fine.”

Yeah! States’ rights?